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Author Topic: Jokes/Puns thread  (Read 25186 times)

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November 14, 2013, 02:07:45 AM
Reply #15

Offline Deviddo

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Re: Jokes/Puns thread
« Reply #15 on: November 14, 2013, 02:07:45 AM »
Beed, why?

Why did the boy drop his ice cream?
He was hit by a bus.
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November 14, 2013, 02:35:45 AM
Reply #16

Offline Solar Equinox

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DARK JOKE TIME
« Reply #16 on: November 14, 2013, 02:35:45 AM »
What do you call a child with no arms and no legs.

NAMES!
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November 14, 2013, 02:38:56 AM
Reply #17

Offline Deviddo

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Re: Jokes/Puns thread
« Reply #17 on: November 14, 2013, 02:38:56 AM »
An irishman walks out of a bar.
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November 14, 2013, 06:47:15 AM
Reply #18

Offline Bikdark

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Re: Jokes/Puns thread
« Reply #18 on: November 14, 2013, 06:47:15 AM »
Quote from: "Deviddo"
An irishman walks out of a bar.
Instead of exhaling more air than I usually do, that one actually made me laugh.
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November 14, 2013, 12:56:50 PM
Reply #19

Offline Deviddo

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Re: Jokes/Puns thread
« Reply #19 on: November 14, 2013, 12:56:50 PM »
You found that funny?
I'm not trying hard enough with my anti-humor then.

-----

Why was six afraid of seven?
It wasn't.  Numbers are not sentient and thus incapable of feeling fear.
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November 14, 2013, 05:09:58 PM
Reply #20

Offline -FiniteZero-

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Re: Jokes/Puns thread
« Reply #20 on: November 14, 2013, 05:09:58 PM »
What sits in a tree, weighs six pounds, and is very dangerous?

A sparrow with a machine gun.

What's pink, writes, and is harmful to the touch?

A ball-point jellyfish.
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November 14, 2013, 05:29:43 PM
Reply #21

Offline Ceridran

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Re: Jokes/Puns thread
« Reply #21 on: November 14, 2013, 05:29:43 PM »
Two men walk into a bar.

They had stomach pain for the rest of the day.
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November 14, 2013, 06:13:48 PM
Reply #22

Offline Deviddo

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Re: Jokes/Puns thread
« Reply #22 on: November 14, 2013, 06:13:48 PM »
"Knock knock?"
"Who's there?"
"John."
"John who?"

John proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimer's has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.
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November 16, 2013, 04:20:13 PM
Reply #23

Offline Tfp BreakDown

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Re: Jokes/Puns thread
« Reply #23 on: November 16, 2013, 04:20:13 PM »
Does this vid count?

(click to show/hide)
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November 16, 2013, 04:57:50 PM
Reply #24

Offline Ceridran

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Re: Jokes/Puns thread
« Reply #24 on: November 16, 2013, 04:57:50 PM »
Once, there was a man with short arms competing in a footrace, who reached.

The End.
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November 16, 2013, 05:41:10 PM
Reply #25

Offline Beed28

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Re: Jokes/Puns thread
« Reply #25 on: November 16, 2013, 05:41:10 PM »
In Jelly World, what do people use to instantly warp from one location to another?
(click to show/hide)

plz don't kill me
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November 16, 2013, 06:04:26 PM
Reply #26

Offline *Alice

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Re: Jokes/Puns thread
« Reply #26 on: November 16, 2013, 06:04:26 PM »
What do you call an evil cornflakes monster?
(click to show/hide)
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November 16, 2013, 11:08:02 PM
Reply #27

Offline Deviddo

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Re: Jokes/Puns thread
« Reply #27 on: November 16, 2013, 11:08:02 PM »
Beed.

-----

What would George Washington do if he were alive today?

Scream and scratch at the lid of his coffin.
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November 16, 2013, 11:30:37 PM
Reply #28

Offline Beed28

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Re: Jokes/Puns thread
« Reply #28 on: November 16, 2013, 11:30:37 PM »
Two fish were swimming around in a tank. One of them says to the other:
(click to show/hide)
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November 17, 2013, 02:04:04 AM
Reply #29

Offline Deviddo

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Re: Jokes/Puns thread
« Reply #29 on: November 17, 2013, 02:04:04 AM »
A horse walked into a bar.
Several people got up and left as they spotted the potential danger in the situation.
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