Cutstuff Forum

General => Anything Goes => Topic started by: Donutyoshi on January 09, 2011, 11:54:29 AM

Title: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Donutyoshi on January 09, 2011, 11:54:29 AM
We all know Chuck Norris is pretty awesome, so why not make a forum game about him?
Rules are simple, just post one fact (Doesn't have to be realistic) about how awesome he is.

Example: Chuck Norris can break the 10th Wall if he wanted to.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Max on January 09, 2011, 12:06:53 PM
Saxton Hale beat Chuck Norris in a staring contest.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Super Raveman on January 09, 2011, 12:15:45 PM
Did you know giraffes didn't exist until Chuck Norris did a upper cut to a horse?
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Snake33AU on January 09, 2011, 12:54:40 PM
Chuck Norris wrote the Duck Tales moon theme.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: KillerChair on January 09, 2011, 04:15:15 PM
Chuck Norris his fart was the big bang.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Max on January 09, 2011, 05:12:41 PM
Chuck Norris is overrated
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: KillerChair on January 09, 2011, 09:56:40 PM
Quote from: "Yellow Devil"
Chuck Norris is overrated

Overrated is Chuck Norris.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Epsilon on January 10, 2011, 05:54:33 AM
Chuck Norris stumbles upon a lamb which has cancer, he touched it on the head, the cancer was gone and the little lamb was hopping and skipping happily. Chuck Norris then round-house kicked it half way across the world. Chuck Norris says to himself "What Chuck Norris can give, he can take away."

I forgot how it went, but it was similar to this, Oh well.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Mr. Sean Nelson on January 10, 2011, 08:12:07 AM
Chuck Norris defeated Air man.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: NitroBro on January 10, 2011, 11:19:03 AM
Chuck norris beat mega man 1 his first time through
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: KillerChair on January 10, 2011, 11:56:48 AM
At halloween Chuck Norris just takes his shirt off...
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Snake33AU on January 10, 2011, 12:16:27 PM
Chuck Norris wasn't in the movie "The Expendables" because he would have made the other people redundant.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: TheBladeRoden on January 10, 2011, 07:04:06 PM
Chuck Norris can beat Yellow Devil without the pause trick
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: KillerChair on January 10, 2011, 07:44:36 PM
Chuck Norris lives in a round house... a villa actually.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Blaze Yeager on January 12, 2011, 01:52:22 AM
I heard Chuck Norris has Bigger Balls of Steel than Duke Nukem
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Mr. Sean Nelson on January 12, 2011, 07:08:05 AM
Chuck Norris broke the fifth wall.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: KillerChair on January 12, 2011, 12:52:39 PM
Quote from: "Sean Nelson"
Chuck Norris broke the fifth wall.

Chuck Norris broke alot more than just a fifth wall :p
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Mr. Sean Nelson on January 13, 2011, 04:22:50 AM
Quote from: "KillerChair"
Quote from: "Sean Nelson"
Chuck Norris broke the fifth wall.

Chuck Norris broke alot more than just a fifth wall :p

The fourth wall is the imaginary "wall" at the front of the stage in a traditional three-walled box set in a proscenium theatre, through which the audience sees the action in the world of the play.
The presence of the fourth wall is an established convention of modern realistic theatre, which has led some artists to draw direct attention to it for dramatic or comedic effect when this boundary is "broken", for example by an actor onstage speaking to the audience directly.

The term "fifth wall" has been used as an extension of the fourth wall concept to refer to the "invisible wall between critics or readers and theatre practitioners." This conception led to a series of workshops at the Globe Theatre in 2004 designed to help break the fifth wall.

The fifth wall is a much stronger conceptual wall, actors break the fourth wall, Chuck Norris breaks the fifth wall.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: KillerChair on January 13, 2011, 01:18:57 PM
I know about the 4th wall and stuff ;)
I was just joking along the way.

Anyways... Chuck Norris is a 1000 one man bands.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: DWN-019 on January 15, 2011, 03:59:53 AM
Humans need oxygen to survive. Oxygen needs Chuck Norris to survive.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Epsilon on January 16, 2011, 04:22:27 AM
Oh yeah,
well Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle....
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: KillerChair on January 16, 2011, 12:09:45 PM
Quote from: "Epsilon"
Oh yeah,
well Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle....

I also saw him doing a wheelie on a boat.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: RainsLikeSnow on January 17, 2011, 06:06:54 PM
Chuck Norris doesn't need tools in minecraft he just round house kicks the blocks  and monsters.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: slapmeorelse on January 20, 2011, 10:01:07 PM
Chuck Norris is so awesome, he doesn't need to post on this thread
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: KillerChair on January 21, 2011, 12:03:23 AM
Chuck Norris simply walks into mordor... or roundhouse's into mordor.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: KentuckyFreidDuo on January 23, 2011, 12:49:41 AM
Chuck Norris can own you without doing it.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Mr. Sean Nelson on January 23, 2011, 06:53:14 PM
The cow jumped over the moon.
Chuck Norris jumped over the cow.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: KillerChair on January 23, 2011, 06:59:28 PM
Chuck Norris can eat a heart attack burger whithout dying.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Galaxy Sisbro on January 23, 2011, 09:51:01 PM
Chuck Norris is CutmanMike Father
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: KentuckyFreidDuo on January 23, 2011, 10:19:29 PM
Chuck Norris gave Kenji Inafune the idea to create megaman.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Epsilon on January 24, 2011, 09:42:05 PM
Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo (Wally) is hiding.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: CHAOS_FANTAZY on January 29, 2011, 04:53:52 AM
Chuck Norris can punch through the six realms of separation and punch anyone, anywhere, anytime.

If you have five dollars, and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: KillerChair on January 29, 2011, 12:40:25 PM
Chuck Norris can touch death and make death die.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Donutyoshi on January 30, 2011, 02:06:55 PM
Chuck Norris can defeat all of the legendary Pokemon in one round-house kick.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: KillerChair on January 30, 2011, 04:20:47 PM
Chuck Norris can steal Megaman's powers.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Mr. Sean Nelson on January 30, 2011, 08:21:52 PM
Chuck Norris doesn't travel through time.
Time travels through Chuck Norris.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: KillerChair on January 30, 2011, 09:09:48 PM
Chuck Norris doesn't know pain yet pain fears Chuck Norris.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: TheBladeRoden on January 31, 2011, 07:33:26 PM
Chuck Norris doesn't randomly reverse statements to make them into Chuck Norris facts. Chuck Norris facts randomly reverse themselves into statements, Chuck Norris.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Epsilon on February 01, 2011, 01:10:17 AM
a Chuck can Norris, but a Norris can't Chuck
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: easyaspi on February 02, 2011, 12:52:34 AM
Chuck Norris popped a lead balloon.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: KillerChair on February 02, 2011, 01:16:16 AM
Chuck Norris can safely divide by zero.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Blaze Yeager on February 04, 2011, 01:57:53 AM
Chuck Norris can defeat Shen Long to continue
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: KillerChair on February 04, 2011, 12:11:49 PM
Chuck Norris can easily beat battletoads.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Epsilon on February 05, 2011, 12:22:39 AM
Quote from: "KillerChair"
Chuck Norris can easily beat battletoads.
that game is a nightmare to beat!

...Chuck Norris is so awesome, he can win a game of connect four in just three moves.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: KillerChair on February 05, 2011, 12:48:30 AM
No matter how good you think... Chuck Norris always wins tic tac toe.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Donutyoshi on February 05, 2011, 03:07:53 AM
Chuck Norris can be better then you at every video game.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: KillerChair on February 05, 2011, 01:05:01 PM
Chuck Norris wins with rock paper scissors even when you have paper and he has rock.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Mr. Sean Nelson on February 06, 2011, 02:41:12 AM
Chuck Norris doesn't fight crime, crime fights Chuck Norris.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: KillerChair on February 06, 2011, 01:10:58 PM
Quote from: "Sean Nelson"
Chuck Norris doesn't fight crime, crime fights Chuck Norris.

And loses ofcourse.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Flandre Scarlet on February 23, 2011, 12:22:07 AM
Chuck norris can beat airman.
Chuck norris can't beat Flandre.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Mr. Sean Nelson on February 23, 2011, 09:54:51 AM
Chuck Norris can beat Airman.
Chuck Norris can beat Flandre.
Chuck Norris can't beat Sean.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Flandre Scarlet on February 23, 2011, 04:24:06 PM
Chuck Norris dissapproves of Lies.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: KillerChair on February 23, 2011, 06:38:12 PM
Chuck Norris never has itches.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: chuggaafan1 on February 24, 2011, 03:09:56 AM
Chuck Norris Created God
God Created The World
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Nickaly on March 29, 2011, 11:51:38 PM
Chuck norris can jump so high that he can kick in the chin.

Chuck norris welds with his eyes.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Mr. X on March 29, 2011, 11:53:02 PM
Chuck Norris facepalms at your necropost the same as everyone else.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: -FiniteZero- on March 29, 2011, 11:53:46 PM
Chuck Norris beat QWOP.
On his first try.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Magnet Dood on May 01, 2011, 03:19:18 AM
Chuck Norris can steal other's powers just by casting a sideward glance to them.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Donutyoshi on May 01, 2011, 04:36:42 AM
Chuck Norris can punch your face so hard that will make you look pretty.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: KillerChair on May 01, 2011, 11:36:01 AM
Chuck Norris makes poop smell good!
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Magnet Dood on May 01, 2011, 08:07:52 PM
Chuck Norris had the first ever balls.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: MagnetMan497 on May 01, 2011, 10:39:31 PM
Chuck Norris can believe it's not butter
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Donutyoshi on May 02, 2011, 12:29:13 AM
Chuck Norris can beat Magnet Man in 0.1 seconds without any cheat codes or rapid fire technique.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: LlamaHombre on May 02, 2011, 12:33:29 AM
Chuck Norris is the only one who can bi-win faster than Charlie Sheen.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: MagnetMan497 on May 02, 2011, 01:01:26 AM
Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: KillerChair on May 02, 2011, 04:04:11 PM
Chuck Norris got cake at the end of Portal.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: arkman on May 02, 2011, 08:57:57 PM
Chuck Norris MADE the cake at the end of portal.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: MegaTuga on May 02, 2011, 09:59:17 PM
Chuck Norris cannot punch himself, his arms will bounce off his face when trying.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Magnet Dood on May 02, 2011, 10:14:53 PM
Chuck Norris can pull off a 360 two-flip dunk from the free throw line flawlessly.

On his first try.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: KillerChair on May 02, 2011, 10:46:15 PM
Chuck Norris made god before god made the world.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Donutyoshi on May 03, 2011, 12:03:17 AM
Quote from: "chuggaafan1"
Chuck Norris Created God
God Created The World
Quote from: "KillerChair"
Chuck Norris made god before god made the world.
Chuck Norris doesn't approve of reused jokes.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Duora Super Gyro on May 03, 2011, 09:42:33 AM
Chuck Norris is in brawl!!!
(click to show/hide)
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Cheminometry on May 03, 2011, 03:01:41 PM
The Vin Diesel Fact Generator preceeded the Chuck Norris Fact Generator, the latte ronly became more popular thanks ot Conan o Brien Chuck Norris Lever.

What people don't know is that Vin Diesel is Chuck Norris in disguise.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: KillerChair on May 03, 2011, 05:06:36 PM
Quote from: "Donutyoshi"
Quote from: "chuggaafan1"
Chuck Norris Created God
God Created The World
Quote from: "KillerChair"
Chuck Norris made god before god made the world.
Chuck Norris doesn't approve of reused jokes.
Chuck Norris knows i didnt notice this joke being used already.
And Chuck Norris can, And therefore is.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: FiremanX on May 03, 2011, 06:16:32 PM
Chuck Norris can defeat mm7 wily capsule without getting damaged.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: KillerChair on May 04, 2011, 12:02:16 AM
Quote from: "FiremanX"
Chuck Norris can defeat mm7 wily capsule without getting damaged.
Im getting quite close to that actually ;)
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Magnet Dood on May 05, 2011, 09:21:30 PM
Chuck Norris runs so fast, if he hit a baseball, he would get hit in the head at second base.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: MegaTuga on May 06, 2011, 02:41:23 PM
Chuck Norris can play tennis in pairs with himself only.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Duora Super Gyro on May 06, 2011, 03:21:15 PM
so can i... chuck norriss is a ghost and has two s's in norriss
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: KillerChair on May 06, 2011, 05:57:26 PM
Chuck Norris has a power level of over 9000!
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: LikeLakers2 on May 09, 2011, 01:51:12 AM
Chuck Norris has a thread about fake jokes about him in the Anything Goes forum on cutstuff.net.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Hallan Parva on May 09, 2011, 02:12:35 AM
Chuck Norris can do so many things, even Naruto doesn't believe it.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: KillerChair on May 09, 2011, 09:21:19 AM
If you have 10 dollars and Chuck has 10 dollars... Chuck has more money than you have.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: LikeLakers2 on May 09, 2011, 01:11:52 PM
Quote from: "KillerChair"
If you have 10 dollars and Chuck has 10 dollars... Chuck has more money than you have.
If one person has a fact, and you have a fact that is similar in pretty much every way to it, the first person is cooler.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: KillerChair on May 09, 2011, 02:50:43 PM
Chuck Norris is the man behind the awesome face.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: RainsLikeSnow on May 14, 2011, 05:30:54 AM
Chuck Norris can hug a Minecraft creeper and not make it explode
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: ice on May 14, 2011, 07:36:41 AM
Chuck Norris dosent sleep with a gun under his pillow, he sleeps with his pillow under his gun
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Plasma on May 15, 2011, 01:39:46 PM
Chuck can force Oblige to make Good, Detailed, Awesome, KDiZD-like Maps.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: KillerChair on May 15, 2011, 02:22:15 PM
Chuck Norris eats pancakes in the morning.

PANCAKES ARE AWESOME!!!
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: MidnightTH on May 17, 2011, 09:03:39 PM
Chuck existed before the Universe.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: CuppaBro on May 19, 2011, 03:56:29 AM
If it looks like chicken, tastes like chicken, sounds like chicken, smells like chicken, and feels like chicken, but Chuck Norris says it's beef, he's lying to you. It's still chicken.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: BiscuitSlash on May 19, 2011, 04:58:24 PM
Chuck Norris can score 400 on a normal game of bowling
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Magnet Dood on May 21, 2011, 02:13:00 AM
Chuck Norris can make jean shorts awesome.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: FiremanX on May 28, 2011, 02:24:25 PM
Chuck Norris can port Super Smash Bros. Brawl on PC without using any programs.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: BiscuitSlash on May 28, 2011, 05:36:13 PM
Chuck Norris can use a fire extinguisher to make Pluto burn you know, the planet? the one that always was?
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Anonymous on May 29, 2011, 05:21:07 PM
Chuck can divide by zero with portals.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: MegaTuga on June 08, 2011, 08:29:44 PM
Chuck Norris doesn't blow candles for his anniversary. He blows the sun.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Alucard on June 15, 2011, 08:28:10 PM
Quote from: "MegaTuga"
Chuck Norris doesn't blow candles for his anniversary. He blows the sun.

That sounds...suggestive.

Chuck Norris is the reason Chuck Norris is Chuck Norris.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: LlamaHombre on June 15, 2011, 08:36:03 PM
Chuck Norris will never die.

He'll get tired of kicking mortal ass, and go to find the gods.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Lord Toadman on June 15, 2011, 08:36:41 PM
Chuck Norris is still funny and relevant even in 2011
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: KillerChair on June 15, 2011, 09:15:54 PM
I kinda like this one aswell.
(click to show/hide)
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Alucard on June 15, 2011, 09:22:30 PM
Chuck Norris can walk on water AND swim on land.

Why?

Because Jesus Christ was Chuck Norris' disguise.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Mr. Sean Nelson on June 15, 2011, 11:41:51 PM
Chuck Norris walks through solid walls without no_clip true.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Alucard on June 16, 2011, 12:50:12 AM
Chuck Norris is the only person who can cheat without Dr. Hax getting them.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: chuggaafan1 on June 16, 2011, 01:11:07 AM
Chuck Norris Doesn't Drink Cucumber beer And Stole The Precious Thing.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: Alucard on June 16, 2011, 01:17:13 AM
Chuck Norris frowns upon your pitifully obvious Touhou references.
Title: Re: Make a fake Chuck Norris fact.
Post by: GameAndWatcher on June 17, 2011, 10:00:58 PM
Chuck Norris can have his hands on Falco Lombardi's prey.