Show Posts
61
Anything Goes / Re: Cutstuff Sanctuary
« on: October 28, 2013, 10:00:05 PM »
To be deathly honest, I think society should ditch the connotations about what is "MANNLY" and what is "girly~" to begin with. It's only giving us more excuses to segregate one another. Who really cares? If you need to insult a disreputable someone, honestly look at their character and find their undesirable traits. It's not that hard.
I don't have very exciting confessions, but I'll spill my heart on the table anyway. I'm not sure if I've ever even told this story, but I will now. As a young'in, I was...stupid, put bluntly. Stupid and foolish and ANGRY ALL THE TIME. I used to get angry at everything; I was the most frustratable person ever. Look at me funny? I'll swing at you. Bad grade back? Tear up the paper. Say something snarky? I won't miss with the swing. Hit me? Why, I'd tackle you to the ground and bury my teeth in your arm. I was assigned to two different therapists at once, it was so bad. Of course, I was too dumb to know the solution was to not care until much later. At that stage in my life, I was just so angry and frustrated with life that I had no motivation to do anything. Why bother getting out of bed and going to school and doing my work and inevitably getting pissed and punching some guy and getting in trouble for it? There were no friends for me to talk to, nothing fun for me to do (Since I was banned from fun things due to being such a problem), and, of course, from my point of view, "NO ONE UNDERSTANDS ME BAW TEEN ANGST". Glad I got that out of the way in my preteen years.
Anyway, I eventually found a good therapist who did understand me, and put me back on the right track. You got the tail end of my childish rage and stupidity, and I'd say I turned out to be a pretty okay individual.
As far as modern-day flaws go, the one that bothers me the most is...I'm a scaredy-cat and I'm totally ashamed of it. I've been painfully susceptible to jump-scares since childhood and that's not changed at all. I get "scared" in the conventional sense so easily that I refuse to see horror movies, play horror games, and otherwise get into scary situations. Once I've gone through a scary situation, I file it under "CAN" or "CAN'T," and if it's "CAN," I get used to it, and it alone doesn't scare me anymore (Which is why I don't roll around on the floor screaming incomprehensibly every time I play GvHNES). If it's "CAN'T," I avoid contact with it at all costs. For a long time, River Twygz Bed has been a "CAN'T" for me, ever since I made the fatal mistake of going down into the bed at, like, one in the morning. If I'm seriously unnerved though I get reminded of everything that's ever scared me before and it's like a big old ugly nightmare monster and aaaaaagh
So yeah
I'm a chicken
I don't have very exciting confessions, but I'll spill my heart on the table anyway. I'm not sure if I've ever even told this story, but I will now. As a young'in, I was...stupid, put bluntly. Stupid and foolish and ANGRY ALL THE TIME. I used to get angry at everything; I was the most frustratable person ever. Look at me funny? I'll swing at you. Bad grade back? Tear up the paper. Say something snarky? I won't miss with the swing. Hit me? Why, I'd tackle you to the ground and bury my teeth in your arm. I was assigned to two different therapists at once, it was so bad. Of course, I was too dumb to know the solution was to not care until much later. At that stage in my life, I was just so angry and frustrated with life that I had no motivation to do anything. Why bother getting out of bed and going to school and doing my work and inevitably getting pissed and punching some guy and getting in trouble for it? There were no friends for me to talk to, nothing fun for me to do (Since I was banned from fun things due to being such a problem), and, of course, from my point of view, "NO ONE UNDERSTANDS ME BAW TEEN ANGST". Glad I got that out of the way in my preteen years.
Anyway, I eventually found a good therapist who did understand me, and put me back on the right track. You got the tail end of my childish rage and stupidity, and I'd say I turned out to be a pretty okay individual.
As far as modern-day flaws go, the one that bothers me the most is...I'm a scaredy-cat and I'm totally ashamed of it. I've been painfully susceptible to jump-scares since childhood and that's not changed at all. I get "scared" in the conventional sense so easily that I refuse to see horror movies, play horror games, and otherwise get into scary situations. Once I've gone through a scary situation, I file it under "CAN" or "CAN'T," and if it's "CAN," I get used to it, and it alone doesn't scare me anymore (Which is why I don't roll around on the floor screaming incomprehensibly every time I play GvHNES). If it's "CAN'T," I avoid contact with it at all costs. For a long time, River Twygz Bed has been a "CAN'T" for me, ever since I made the fatal mistake of going down into the bed at, like, one in the morning. If I'm seriously unnerved though I get reminded of everything that's ever scared me before and it's like a big old ugly nightmare monster and aaaaaagh
So yeah
I'm a chicken
