The Cutopian Writers' Guild

[Dr. Freeman]

Btw, we need a Cutopian timeline, or something that gathers everything up together as if they were all a chronological story. :I

That'd be nice, but here's the thing

Cutstuff War (part 2) never actually finished
even though Freeman gave us his outline

and then Cold Foosion and Smash decided to use dimensional shenanigans introduced in CSW Part 1
to maintain Siege World

there's also the matter of chronology
everything is set in 20XX
so there's no specific time for anything
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Basically, because of siege the timeline is forced to split after CSW 1 (and a little into 2) and that's something else.

I can timeline my own stories rather easily however, because it's all numbered anyway.

CSW1- CSW2- Lengthy Break of Nothing- Island Survival 1-3- Cutstuff Adventure
And the Robot Blathers Marathon is in its own little world.

[Dr. Freeman]

THE ROBOT BLATHERS MARATHON PART 8
Gumball Saves the Zoo

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One day gumball decided to go to the zoo because he was bored and maybe laughing at stupid animals would make him feel better about his life.
“Hey Thunder, let's go to the zoo buddy.”
“how about you let me do jumping jacks to lady gaga songs in peace you loser”
“ohok”

So Gumball took his car and did neat front car flips up buildings into he got into the zoo gates.
But when he got to the zoo the zoo was in total ruins and explosions!
“oh no! What happened to the zoo?”
the zookeeper turned around and was kinda sad, “some hamsters got pretty pissed of being in the zoo and started going wild and killing innocents by making them do laps on hamster wheels
gumball gasped, “that sounds stupid and like a diet and we all know that those are dumb so I will save the zoo!!!!!”

Gumball began to do crazy jump kicks but sadly he had no idea what the hell he was doing. But because he was such a good sport he did a roll into the local fish pit and looked at the fish.
“man, fish are so cool because they aren't dicks except the ones in the ocean last chapter that I shouldn't know about.”
But before gumball could ruin the story any further, a mountain of hamsters emerged from the fish water!
“I'M A HAMSTER” one said
“AND I AM ONE TOO” a second said
“AND ME THREEEEE-”
“SHUT THE FUCK UP BILLY NO ONE LIKES YOU”
“ohok”

Gumball took this argument as an indication that he should be really cool and he ripped out the fish food feeder dispense and threw it at the hamster mountain. But the hamsters were way too cool for school and kept tweeting about YOLO SWAG and destroyed the fish food!
“what a puzzle this is” gumball said as he ran away but was cornered by hamsters on all sides!

But Gumball was smart and called Thunder on his shoe phone, “thunder i'm about to die do you want to help.”
“no”
“oh”
without thunder's help, Gumball threw his shoe phone at the hamsters. While it didn't do shit it did reveal a hamster drinky thingy!
One hamster was like, “oh shit i'm actually kinda thirsty” and they all drunk from the hamster drink thingy but the water was secretly death and they all died.
“I did it!” Gumball exclaimed while he was happy and not sad, “I saved the zoo!

“Not so fast!”

The hamster drinky thingy suddenly exploded revealing...ROBOT BLATHERS MARK 7!!!
“goddammit robot blathers why don't you earn your high school diploma or something like that”
Robot Blathers Mark 7 laughed, “BECAUSE NOW I CAN TAKE OVER THE ZOO AND USE IT'S ANIMALS TO BUILD THE VERY FIRST ANIMAL ROLLAR COASTER”
“wow that sounds really cool and stupid.”
“HOW DARE YOU INSULT MY ART, YOU WILL DIE!” Robot Blathers Mark 7 said as he took out a laser kitten that shot lasers and began shooting lasers.
Gumball did some sweet cartwheels and kicked some soccer balls into a goal.
“wow you're moves are so sweet” robot blathers Mark 7 said.
“I know right, but now I have to do something cool.” Gumball said as he jumped back into the fish pit and took out a giant fish.
“I'M GONNA KICK YOUR BASS SON!” Gumball said as he slapped Robot Blathers Mark 7 with the fish which caused him to fall and caused his laser kitty to go flying to Saturn.
“oh no how did you know fish hurt” Robot Blathers Mark 7 asked but he didn't really care because he was a jerk.
“Well you see, let me write you a five page essay on why I am winning”
but before gumball could write that A- Essay, Robot Blathers Mark 7 began to absorb all the animals in the zoo!
Gumball gasped but then coughed on a hotdog, “OH NO! THIS IS SERIOUS!” he exclaimed as Robot Blathers Mark 7 began to shoot a shit ton of animals at Gumball's face.
Robot Blathers Mark 7 kept laughing because he liked the sound of his own voice but while he did Gumball punched a lion in the face so hard it fell back into Robot Blathers Mark 7.
“YOU'VE GOT TO BE KITTEN ME!” Robot Blathers Mark 7 said as the lion hit his head and he was on fire and all the animals were saved.

“wow gumball you sure are cool except not really because it is at least 89 degrees outside today because it's a nice day” the zookeeper said.

Gumball laughed but then shut up because he realized he sounded like an idiot.
And everyone loved Gumball for saving the zoo for two hours before everyone forgot about some stupid shit he did.

THE END PROBABLY NOT

[Hallan Parva]

more information for the three of you that cared


Short Synopsis:

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Because life isn't just a game.

Merillion Chauer, member of the prestigious Chauer family of attorneys, decides that a life of law practice isn't enough for a man of his talents. And by that, we mean "shooting bolts of ice from your hands". He decides to join The Guild, a mishmosh amassment of amateur adventurers from all over the country, in an attempt to liven up his previously boring and reserved life. Along the way, he meets plenty of new friends and foes, such as the enigmatic writer Sachi Strider, the creepy-cool necromancer Laurina Shadowen, and... a bear in a fedora? Don't forget about the two Guild Masters -- Vilrich Armstrong, a boisterous old man whose reckless attitude belies his experience and expertise, and Jasper Whysp, whose sword is the only thing sharper than her intellect. And her attitude.

Follow Merillion's adventures to far-off lands and treacherous dangers, while checking back with the other members of The Guild from time to time, in order to experience a story with more faces than your game master's favorite D20.

Teaser Excerpt:

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Vilrich leaned back in his chair, his legs resting on his desk.

Today was a stiff day. Rarely was there ever a stiff day in Vilrich's life, but today was one of those times. Miles of footsteps crossing through the doors. Piles of paperwork begged for ink to flow across their pages. Every hallway of The Guild was filled with anxiety and confusion. It was time for seasonal orientation, when all of The Guild's new recruits flooded into Vascore to start their grand adventures... if you want to call them that. Sure, a few select heroes would end up embarking on life-changing quests across the lands, discovering new friends, conquering fierce foes, and discovering their true selves who were buried deep within their feelings and thoughts, but for the most part the new recruits wouldn't even reach Level 10 before dropping out and taking up a more 'traditional' line of work. Normally, this would be an exciting day for just about anyone, but to Vilrich it only meant more office work, more filing, more cross-examining form after form to make sure nothing was out of line – for if a single mistake were to persist, Jasper would make sure he'd never hear the end of it.

I'll probably post Chapter 2 later today as well, so you can get to know Merillion a bit better.

[SaviorSword]

the post where I talk about my dreams

Gosh darn it Savior you don't post your dreams here

We have a separate thread for that, right here



also I periodically update the front post with everyone's stories (in order of postage; organized by either Cutopian or non-Cutopian

Whoops, sorry! I've been outta the loop for a while. Anywho, what this topic really needs is critique/comments on other's stuff. Folks should at least try to give a comment/critique once every time they post somethin' themselves, or at the very least have some sort of incentive.

[Hallan Parva]

okay I know what I'm going to do now

I'll just put up half of Chapter 2 so I don't give away all the new characters at the same time

(click to show/hide)

Merillion Chauer let out a deep sigh.

After wandering around Vascore like a lost puppy, he had managed to find The Guild before orientation had started. The elegant bronze doors were standing wide open, revealing a swarm of young adventurers frantically running about. The usual desk for reception had nobody standing behind it, abandoned in favor of several tables that were set up in a line. Each table handled a different stage of the registration process: the first table was for signing in, making sure each new recruit had already sent in their application forms beforehand; the next was dedicated to handing out The Guild's identification cards; the next, for assigning each person their own Class and Rank; the next, for joining the voluntary Party Builder program, where those who were running solo could opt to join other recruits and form teams at random.

Once he found the start of the makeshift 'line', Merillion reluctantly approached the crowd. He never did well around crowds of people. He liked things quiet, spaced out. Merillion was of the persuasion that a good book would contain far more interesting stories than the town market, and he never really got out that much. This was part of the reason he decided to join The Guild in the first place; to meet new people, see new things, make his life more dynamic and exciting. The other reason was far less humble, but Merillion thought it just as important. The Chauer family has a long line of honored attorneys, with their family law practice Chauer & Sauer approaching its two-hundredth year of operation. Unlike most of the Chauers, however, Merillion was born with a gift outside of the legal field. Ever since the age of 10 when his science fair's baking soda volcano project erupted with actual fire, Merillion was aware that he had an extraordinary penchant for magic. Controlling and summoning magical energy came to him much easier than most others around him, and being fascinated with the wonders of the arcane arts, he thought it would be a waste to limit himself as a prosecutor simply to carry on a family tradition.

The line shifted forward. Merillion slowly shuffled to the first desk, nervously rubbing his neck. He stood out in Lynndef due to his looks alone, but here in Vascore he looked no stranger than his fellow Scholar. For a 19-year-old, he was notably tall and lanky, lacking the muscular build of a Grappler, but still had enough substance to appear healthy and not underweight or skeletal. His blazing red hair was combed neatly, coming to swirling curled points at the sides but otherwise very orderly and tidy. He had a few short wisps of hair lining his forehead, but no outrageous bangs obscuring his steely grey eyes. His usual attire of charcoal grey tee, pitch black slacks was complimented by a short crimson cape, its collar frilled up, secured to his body by a yellow chain which had a small green gem centered within it. He tugged at the cape's edges with his scarlet fingerless gloves. His blazing red boots kicked at the ground nervously, out of habit. Such a cape made him feel like an outsider looking at his previous life, but Merillion figured that if he was going to become a great mage, he may as well dress the part.

The girl at the desk slid a clipboard and pen to Merillion. She looked over her hands, presumably inspecting her nails for any flaws. “Find your name on the list and initial it,” she said without looking up. “If you can't find your name, let me know. Okay?”

He flipped past the first two pages. “Yes, here I am. Merillion Chauer.”

“Chauer, eh?” The girl looked up, squinting her eyes. “You're pretty young for a lawyer.”

“Oh, uh...” Merillion cleared his throat. “I'm not really in that line of work anymore.”

“You're not? Oh,” the girl said dryly. She looked at her nails again. “You look smart enough for it. Real cute too.”

“T-thanks? I guess?” Merillion was caught somewhat off-guard.

The girl noticed his discomfort, letting out a chuckle. “Oh, I'm sorry if I made you feel strange or anything. Well, you're all taken care of, so you can go to the next station. Alright?”

“Yeah...” he said as he shuffled over to the second table.

The table had lots of blank laminated cards, neatly stacked into piles. There was a camera to the side, facing a white backdrop stand. In front of the backdrop was an X on the floor, marked with tape. This would all seem normal for having a photo taken, if it wasn't for the fact that the designated photographer was not a normal person, nor was it a person at all. Standing behind the second desk was a large white bear wearing a pair of prescription spectacles and a black fedora.

The bear nodded, pointing toward the X. Merillion stammered a bit before quickly moving to the mark on the floor. The bear grabbed an ID card and walked over to the camera, inserting the card into a slot on the side. It then slouched in front of the camera, pulling the sheet over its face. 3-2-1-FLASH! Merillion blinked, slightly fazed by the flash, more so by the bear who was retrieving the card from the side of the camera. It reached out to Merillion, holding the laminated card in its claws. Nervously, Merillion grabbed the card with two fingers as if it were radioactive or something. He quickly pulled his arm back as soon as the bear released its grasp, and retreated to the line of new recruits headed for the next station. This just keeps getting weirder and weirder, he thought as he walked up to the third desk.

The third desk was manned by a robotic elf.

I knew it. Merillion let out a sigh of despair. I just knew it.

[Jatea]

Anywho, what this topic really needs is critique/comments on other's stuff. Folks should at least try to give a comment/critique once every time they post somethin' themselves, or at the very least have some sort of incentive.

I kinda want to start this up too but some people might critique too harshly, shutting down potential writers and making them not want to write anything ever again
or some people might critique too softly and the writers might keep doing annoying things

also we're not exactly a forum game
where you comment on the person above's writings
because of the aforementioned reasons
and a situation where people are barred from posting twice in a row until some other people put up their stuff would be really fucking dumb

but yeah it'd be nice if something like that happened
not sure how you could give an incentive for that sort of thing, though



anyways I found a Writing Resource (you folks better start finding some of those too)
Kitten's Writer's Block Resource Master Post {original post(er) was either removed or is not visible to non-tumblr-ers, I dunno}
basically someone made up a scenario where you read something really great and you want to write but you're stuck and don't know how what to write
and so there's some things you can do to get rid of that writer's block
like listening to Background Noise, Music, getting some Visual Stimulation, etc

go check out the link or something

[Russel]

[3:43:26 PM] Smash Bro: hey
[3:43:36 PM] Smash Bro: you should go post in the Cutopian Writers' Guild
[3:43:47 PM] Smash Bro: stroke my ego while also shutting Musashi up
[3:43:50 PM] Smash Bro: win-win scenario

Well ok then.

I have generally found to enjoy the writing style that Smash tends to have. It tends to hold a large array of continuity which helps add to the ever expanding universe that seems to always exist. Connections made with other locations he created merges all of his new realities with his old ones which helps build his imaginary realm into a larger universe.

[Shmeckie]

I kinda want to start this up too but some people might critique too harshly, shutting down potential writers and making them not want to write anything ever again

If they can't take harsh critique, they wouldn't survive as a writer anyway.

[Colonel ServBot]

Anywho, what this topic really needs is critique/comments on other's stuff. Folks should at least try to give a comment/critique once every time they post somethin' themselves, or at the very least have some sort of incentive.

I kinda want to start this up too but some people might critique too harshly, shutting down potential writers and making them not want to write anything ever again
or some people might critique too softly and the writers might keep doing annoying things

also we're not exactly a forum game
where you comment on the person above's writings
because of the aforementioned reasons

Well, I kinda want everybody to be as harsh as possible if they want to critique my writing. I'll take those reasons so I can actually improve my writing skills.

Actually, a personal goal of mine is to be crowned with the title of 'The Modern Stephen King' or something (btw, Stephen King kicks ass!)


But, still, I've noticed some stuff though too, like  the repetitive repeating of ServBot jumped and ServBot landed on his ServBot feet using his ServBot skills.

[SaviorSword]

I kinda want to start this up too but some people might critique too harshly, shutting down potential writers and making them not want to write anything ever again

If they can't take harsh critique, they wouldn't survive as a writer anyway.

Agree'd. Let's look at map makin' for a moment. Every map is like a piece of literature. Would ya really give out an extreme sugar-coat'd comment about kirbysonic's Elevator Duel? How about omegazerox's maps as well? One way or another, if ya can't take criticism, that's like tryin' to gain without pain.

[Tengu]

Agent 0026: Mission Gumballtoid by Tengu

Yeah so because of my World Literature class I'm being forced to revive this and will be turning it in for an assignment.

[Dr. Freeman]

The Robot Blathers Marathon- Part 9
Llama and Thunder: Dream Team

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Everything in the world was pretty dandy this fine day. Smash and TGOT were alive and doing stupid skate park tricks, Gumball was trying to show off but was doing an awful job because being on fire messes up your awesome skills, Ken and Awbie were shooting each other in Ghost Land and Llama and Thunder were bowling.

Llama roundhouse kicked a bowling ball and got a strike. Seeing this stunt Thunder got mad at losing and punched a bowling pin in the face.
“Wow Thunder, you sure are a super loser” Llama said
Thunder raised a hand to reply but he passed out in the middle of the bowling lane.

“Dammit Thunder, how can I go bowling with your fat body in the way?” Llama said as he jumped on Thunder's face in a rage but when he did he was sucked into his dreaaaam!!!!!

Llama looked around and saw a whale and a giant chicken falling in love, “what the fuck Thunder your dreams are stupid but I need to wake you up so I can go bowling!” and he began to run through Thunder's dream marveling at all the stupid shit he was seeing. In one second the chicken disappeared and was replaced by a giant fucking fat cat dancing with the whale.

Llama continued walking and found Thunder standing on a cliff.
“thunder buddy, your dreams are stupid as shit”

“well I didn't know you were such a fan of sucking dicks” dream thunder said.

“no thunder. We need to wake you up as you are blocking the bowling alley and making many people sad and YOU ARE THE CAUSE OF THIRD WORLD HUNGER”

But before this stupid argument could continue a mob of cherry pies dropped from the sky and surrounded the duo.
“WE ARE PIE. WE WILL CONSUME. WE WILL DIE”

Llama punched Thunder in the back of the head, “thunder you moron this dream is even stupider than you most of the time”

Thunder smiled and gave a thumbs up but then stopped because he's not that much of an idiot, “Don't worry Llama, it's my dream I can summon a MEGA SWORD!” and a mega sword fell from the sky.

“wow thunder, way to just not think of being awesome and killing the pies” llama said

“ok, I see you're too much of a dick for me to care” and thunder walked off the cliff and fell to his not death because he's dreaming.

Llama picked up the Mega Sword and did an amazing hair flip and with one slice he destroyed all the cherry pie in the dream world!

“wow that was easy, now let's wake you up-”

“NOT SO FAST”

Suddenly, the Mega Sword exploded and was revealed to be...ROBOT BLATHERS MARK 8!!!
“THUNDER YOU'RE FUCKING DREAMS ARE THE BIGGEST LOAD OF ICE CREAM TRUCKS SINCE IRON MAN 53”

Robot Blathers Mark 8 laughed, “I'm not a dream! I'm here to harvest Thunder's dream energy to take over the world!!!”

“how about no” llama did a poorly executed roll and fell off the cliff with Thunder.

Thunder laughed, “hey llama how about you kill the robot”

“how about you do shit it's your dream loser” llama said as he kicked Thunder's jugular which turned him into GIANT THUNDER!

Robot Blathers Mark 8 was shocked but then wasn't because he still had his laser cactus and shot thorns of lasers at Giant Thunder! But Giant Thunder ate them all for lunch and was very happy because lasers were yummy and yum.
“wow robot blathers mark 8, give me more food you butt”

“k” Robot Blathers Mark 8 said as he flew right through Giant Thunder's face and killing him. But since it was a dream both Llama and Robot Blathers Mark 8 were pushed out of Thunder's dream and landed on the nacho shelf.

“well this is a cheesy pickle” llama said as he was covered in nacho cheese and he thought he was the funniest guy when he was actually just a moron.

Robot Blathers Mark 8 took out his laser cactus, “you idiot, pickles aren't cheese so now you will be the dead!”

But before he could fire, Thunder was awake and hit Robot Blathers Mark 8's head with a bowling pin which blew him up.

“yay we did it” thunder said

“thunder I did the work you jerk” llama said but before they could go to court over this misunderstanding, the bowling alley man punched them both out because they fucked up his bowling alley. And both Llama and Thunder got sad but moved on with their lives and started playing fake bowling with a wasps nest.

THE BOWLTASTIC END

[Galactan]

Super no

[Ceridran]

edit: no

[Rozark]

Hey I write things but they're called "Poems"
You know those things that look fancy but have deeper meanings
So here's my latest one that isn't really new but you don't know that.

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"One Afternoon"

Once in thy drafts of a solemn autumn
Calmed not of witty tales with dark repress
Lives such maiden by thy cherry blossom
Buried in thy vine scraps of deep distress
By elapsed minutes which cause ample burn
Deep in thy rends of a dove tree's hollow
Down past thy river of her twisted turn
Lost is thy grim fate that she must follow
Patience fell to those ribbons of brute tense
Accursed with thy misfortune to afflict
Incapable of knowing this defense
Continual do thy winds cast conflict
If such struggle was allowed to not cease
Perhaps her mornings shall never see peace

-Rozark Kyouko

May or may not post the previous ones before this; it depends how this one turns out.