The Cutopian Writers' Guild

[Thunderono]

why do I even bother
I don't know I tend to think of shit during photography class or whatever and it nags at me until I get it down somewhere
so whoop

A Helping Hand

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"What in the world..."

   A massive swell of terrified bystanders ran in the other direction.  Thunder did his best not to get trampled.  All he could see were terrified faces.  He pushed through the mass.  On the other side were four strange men, donned in white, blue, brown, and green hoods.  Upon noticing Thunder, the green one threw a bucket of acid at him.  The bucket clanked against the wall above Thunder, and he narrowly dodged the rain.  He wheeled around to confront them, but got whacked in the face with a surfboard.  Thunder telekinetically grabbed a nearby door and prepared to slam the brown one.  Mid swing, a bright flash emanated from the blue one and Thunder was frozen in place.  The one in white sneered and slammed the ground, creating a wall of ice.  He then sent it rocketing toward Thunder.

   The impact never came.  A rocket sailed past Thunder and slammed into the wall, sending chunks of ice into the group.  One chunk embedded itself perfectly into the blue one's shin, and he let out a yell before collapsing to the ground.  Thunder regained control of himself and swiftly kicked the brown one away.  Curious, he turned toward the source of the rocket.

   A woman with flowing red hair and a massive hammer stood atop a nearby tavern.  She let out a short laugh before jumping down and whacking the green-hooded man in the face.  A resounding shockwave came from the hammer and greenie got launched far away.  The brown-hooded man prepared to whack her with his surfboard, but she fired a rocket at her feet and bounced off a wall toward him.  She readied her hammer in midair and smashed him into a building.  She turned to Thunder.

   "Hey!  It looked like you could use a little help."  Thunder paused to catch his breath.  "Yeah.  A little."

   The man in white sent another wave of ice, and Thunder jumped around it.  He blasted over to the man and swung.  The sword bounced harmlessly off of the man.  "What?!"  He noted the man readying a punch of his own, so he hit him with a wind blast to get some breathing room.  The woman readied her hammer and whacked the man, but the hammer hardly affected him.  He redirected his punch to the ground and sent the woman onto a nearby rooftop.  Thunder noted her agility and jumped up to the roof.  He explained his plan to her, and she leapt off the roof.  Thunder then jumped up and blasted her with wind, sending her rocketing to the ground.  She let a grin reach her lips as she used the momentum to smash the man.  The poor guy got launched underground, and a faint yelp could be heard as the woman fired a rocket down the newly created hole.

   Thunder was doubled over in hysterics.  "Oh my god, man!  Get dunked!  Get dunked!  Thanks for the help, mate."  The woman walked over.  "No problem.  I'm Zoey, by the way."  "Thunder.  Why'd you help out?"  "Meh, it's sort of what I do.  Besides, those guys were assholes."

   Thunder laughed before shooting the blue-hooded man in the face.  "Amen to that.  I'll catch you around."  With that, Thunder dashed off.  Zoey chuckled briefly before turning and going home.

[Dr. Crasger]

Here is an attempt to write about the world looking at it from the big picture, all angles no biases, no leaning to the right, no leaning to the left..

Nothing Cutstuff related in particular. I was discussing how the world was messed up with a couple friends on Skype chat, and ended up trying to write a solution to how we might fix the flaws. In the end it wasn't a solution, but an observation instead.

Dr. Crasger's
The Solution to Life

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The way we are taught, the way we learn and live. There is a flaw. But I can't easily pinpoint what it is. It could be because we are often distracted, it could be because we have so many flaws it's hard to pick one. But as they say: 'one man's trash is another's treasure.' One man's flaw is another’s perfection.  Also, what would life be without flaws? It would be fucking boring if we didn’t have conflict; if there was no dysfunction, life wouldn’t be interesting. Now to cite the problems and my observations…

We all can't coexist. One man can’t be happy without another being completely miserable. We can't get along, because throughout life, the way we are raised brings us to where we want to end up. Our experiences and views are different, but in a way, all the same. None of us are really important, nor are we special.
 
Money is imaginary, social statuses are imaginary. When you get right down to it, the humans are just animals, obviously. Evolved to a point where it got intelligent and questioned its existence. Started to learn, wanted to learn. Having learned, eventually started building the way our society works. It should be noted that we always misinterpret what our ancestors meant. What if their legends, works and religions were all just done for entertainment? What if the future generations misinterpret our works, legends, laws and etc. for something else?

In the end all the laws and rights we had were all just imaginary. The concepts we had were all a way to try and explain the world for us. Time, is only a concept. Numbers, language, religion and the government are all concepts.

Think about it. Religion was created to bring people to the supposed "correct path of living life" and in the end if you did good things before you died, you would be rewarded. You got those concepts going there, the fact that there is a goal. The Bible was written by a group of people, who wanted to tell the others how to live. They wrote the concepts down and laid them out to tell the people to follow them and their crusade to rid the world of all its problems.
Somewhere, somebody screwed up.

It turned into a whole war just because one way of life didn't agree with the other, in fact, we still have that problem till today, but on an even bigger scale than the last time. The universe is a stage, where all of this will and have taken place. I feel like I need to see all of it first, but that is impossible.  The entire history of the world is questionable, as it repeats itself with different forms of society. Ever notice that?

We all had similar problems, problems that even now haven't been fixed, some of the major ones in fact. Sure the world is close to peace and all of that. But it's only taking place really slowly, REALLY slowly. Meanwhile there are side-plots here and there. People live their lives, and die. A chain reaction occurs, but we all know how that works. The stage is the same, the little blue dot. Technology and the search for knowledge progresses, but with progress, the problems that have already been solved disappear and new problems will arise.

Religion and Laws should not be taken too seriously, but should be followed at least, preferably with a grain of salt, just in case it was wrong all along. But it seems to not be the key to a perfect world, which, like the infinite horizon, constantly eludes our grasps. This huge block of text I'm writing has probably been said before, in another language, in another way.
 
We just copy what has already been done, modify it and pass it off as original. Sure there’s still truly original work being made here and there, but with all the things that have already been done. We can’t just make something and not reference what has already been done.

We repeat ourselves. The next generation of the current one is raised in a way that they don’t like what the current generation has done and try to change it, for better or for worse. They create the next generation, and the process repeats itself.

Going back to the topic earlier... Not being able to be equal, and not being special at the same time sure is an oxymoron, but if you look at everything from all angles is true. Look at even more angles and everything starts getting messed up.

WHAT IF. We all agreed. Everyone stops at what they are doing and gathers into one place and discusses using all that they can, whatever talents or skills they might have to try and fix society, and in the end, find that what they must do is to eliminate each other and everyone. That would be a pretty buggered up idea wouldn’t it? This idea doesn’t sound too far-fetched looking back at history. We’re a self-destructive species. To quote a man who had a point: “Life is worth losing”
.
So this is what it’s all about I guess. Generations of us, living, dying, working, playing and doing whatever they can to help someone who is in turn trying not to help another. While others work to fix the world, there are some who work to try and destroy it. We’re all enemies, we’re all the antagonists of this story, but at the same time, if you look at it from another perspective… we were heroes. If there was a book written with all the perspectives that are produced with each character added… it would be pretty fucked up.

So therefore, the ultimate (and obvious) answer to life for a human is undeterminable, because we all have our own wishes.

Man, thinking about how the fuck everything works, and the way the human race had created itself and turned it into something like this, sure is confusing. We’re a rather strange species.
The goal of the human race just might be to distract itself from ever realizing what the fuck is going on here. It's too much for us to handle.  You ever notice that some facts in history go unrecorded? We only take the desirable moments, which is sad, but I am a hypocrite on this one, since I too don’t want to remember the times where I embarrassed myself or did something stupid.  You know what life is overcomplicated. We’re overcomplicating things. I overcomplicated this.

You know what, just live it how you want and don’t let others ruin your good time. Try to make others happy as well. We’ll have none of that materialistic happiness bullshit. Just make others  happy any way you can even if you have to be a cynic. Don’t lie about things people are rather concerned about, but silence doesn’t count as lying… when they ask well then tell them god dammit; lying is alright if it actually does more good than spilling it so be careful with your words and actions. The overall point I’m trying to tell you folks is…

DON’T BE AN ASSHOLE (to yourself or to others.)

EDIT: Changed ending and some text. Made it less cheesy.

That is all.

[Orange juice :l]

I was forced to post this against my will

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Phineas adjusted his suit and took his place behind the counter. Not five minutes after he unlocked the doors, a figure cloaked entirely in metal plating staggered in, dragging along two heaving sacks.
"Can I help you, sir?"
"Yeah, bruv. I'd like to deposit all this stuff into my savings account."
Phineas untied one sack and was immediately assaulted with a foul stench. "Aheh, sorry bruv, council put out a bounty on the Rotworms again. But on the bright side, I found a nest full of good stuff the little buggers ran off with! Hahah!" He gingerly pinched something and pulled out what appeared to be a rotting sweater.
"One woolen sweater-"
"That thing's magic! It makes yuh smarter when yuh wear it!"
"...Enchanted woolen sweater, condition: very... filthy." He grimaced as he feebly attempted to wipe off the fungus growing on the soggy hunk of cloth.
"Oy, careful with that stuff! I know an alchemist in the Dark Forest tha'll pay good money fer it!"
"*Sigh* 24 ounces.. erm, red fuzzy moss." Phineas gritted his teeth as he opened the second sack, but was overcome with relief (and a dite of confusion) when he found it to be full of well organized lumber. "25 planks, two by four, oaken wood. Will that be all?"
"Actually, I'd like to check me balance."
"Will that be your balance in money, or your balance in..." he trailed off as he gestured towards the smattering of disorganized 'Treasure'.
"Euh, money, please. I figure wotever I have isn't worth much cuzza last week's trade meet. Those boys'll buy anythin'."
"Let's see here... Your account currently contains 241,000 gold coins."
The adventurer blinked as he stared off into space.
"...Enough to buy a suit of mithril armor but not enough to buy a thoroughbred horse."
His eyes suddenly lit up. "I'd like to make a withdrawal of... uh... all of it."
Phineas's sense of relief faded immediately. "One moment, sir..." He walked back towards the vault, trying to prepare for the tribulation before him. Life was easier since the bank started storing gold coins in bags instead of simply piling them up, but hauling a sack of 200 pounds worth of solid gold was still anything but easy. He asked a nearby accountant for a hand.
"I'd love to help you with that, but I'm busy trying to figure out how to calculate interest for a Gnoll Tongue."
"Uh, I think you just add .06% of its current market value."
"...That doesn't answer my question at all."
Phineas rolled his eyes and continued dragging the sack. "And here... pant... pant... is the remaining two hundred thousand gold..."
"Awright! I'm off to the market!" And with that, the adventurer effortlessly slung the sack over his shoulder and marched off.
Phineas stared at the door, mouth agape, for a long while after the adventurer left. He only snapped out of his shock when a man cloaked in dark robes entered, a glowing tome in one hand and a bag in another.
"...Can I help you, sir?"

THIS STORY IS END

[Thunderono]

[1/10/2014 11:01:15 PM] Thunder Electros: you know it just hit me
in that thing I did yesterday I made this cult thing to recolor the robot masters and I left it hanging
I should go do something with that

So I've spent the last four hours doing this thing
And the episodes aren't even halfway finished downloading oh god send help

A Helping Hand, Part 2
Now with more everything

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Thunder rewound the footage for what seemed like the hundredth time.  "See that?  Right there!  There he goes!  Now you tell me, what were you doing during that?"

   Thunder stood in the lobby of his tower, giving his security the chewout of a lifetime.  The guard in question stammered and stuttered over a line of flimsy excuses, but Thunder wasn't having it.  "I don't want to hear it.  You fell asleep on the job, and look where it got us.  We can't be getting robbed, John.  Don't let this happen again, or else.  You got that?"  "Well, I-" "Do you understand?!"  "Y-yes, sir!"  Thunder eased up a little.  "Fantastic.  Now get back to your post."  With that, the shell-shocked guard scurried back to his station by the door.  Thunder turned to see a familiar face.  "Ah, Zoey!  To what do I owe this visit?"

   Zoey looked disapprovingly at the disarray of the lobby.  "What happened here?"  Thunder glared at the guard.  "There was a robbery yesterday.  Apparently, it happened during that fiasco with the cultists.  Actually, it was one of them that did it.  Have a look."  Thunder rewound the tape again.  The footage showed a man in white robes splitting into two versions of himself and carting four bags of money past the sleeping guard.  Thunder's eye twitched.  "While this incompetent fool had a nice nap, this guy made off with half the funds in the vault!"

   Zoey simply laughed.  "Calm down, man.  It's not like yelling about it's gonna change anything.  Though, I did come here to talk to you about those cultist guys.  A whole bunch of them went and decided to take over the West Park Train Station.  Hell if I know why.  I was hoping I could get your help on this one?"

   Thunder's face brightened.  "A chance to get back at these bastards?  Count me in!  Let's go!"  With that, the two headed for the exit.  On their way out, the moronic guard sucked in his breath and saluted.  Thunder rolled his eyes.  "You can breathe, John.  I'm not paying you to suffocate."  The guard visibly relaxed as Thunder and Zoey left.  Zoey looked around the parking lot.  "So, which one's your car?"  Thunder looked confused.  "Car?  Heh, I don't get around like that."  Thunder's hoverboots then whirred to life, and he took to the streets.  Zoey hopped on her motorcycle to follow.

...At the station...

   Zoey stopped her bike a block away and continued on foot.  Soon, the station came into view.  As she walked up, Thunder pulled her into an alley.  Thunder shushed her and watched the street, where a jolly little met was enjoying a lovely stroll past the station.  Suddenly, the met dove under his helmet as a gunshot rang from the roof of the station.  Terrified, the met scurried away.  Thunder spoke, "Sniper.  He's got the whole street on lockdown.  We going in quiet, or loud?"  Zoey laughed as she equipped her rocket launcher.  "Well, where's the fun in going in quiet?"  Thunder grinned.  "I like your style."  He hopped up onto a fire escape and made his way to the rooftop of the station.  Up there, he spotted a man in a camouflaged hood holding a sniper rifle.  Behind him stood a man in blood red robes holding a flamethrower.  Suddenly, the red one screeched, "Fire!  Fire!  Burn it all!" before screaming and scorching the rooftop.  Confused, the sniper turned to see Thunder behead the trigger-happy pyromaniac.  Chuckling, he drew aim at the speedster's head, but a well placed rocket from the street knocked him off of the roof.  The last thing he saw was a hammer speeding towards his face.  Thunder dropped a ladder for Zoey.  He looked uncomfortably towards the flames.  "We should get moving.  I'd prefer not to burn to death."  Zoey fired a rocket at a nearby skylight, and the two dropped in.

   Inside, a man in a checkered hood drove a go-kart in an attempt to ram into Zoey.  Before he could connect, Thunder short-circuited the go-kart and blasted it away.  Enraged, the driver hit a button, and wheels of flame flew at the pair.  Zoey leapt out of the way and fired two rockets.  The first connected with the kart, sending the driver flying.  The second blew him to bits in midair.  Impressed, Thunder whistled before continuing to the boarding station.  Inside, four men noted the pair and hurried inside the stationary train.  As it started to gain momentum, Zoey fired a rocket at the back car.  The two rushed to get on the train.  Inside, a man in black armor pulled out a grenade launcher and assaulted them.  Thunder blasted him back a couple cars and dashed up to him before taking a jab.  He would soon note that his sword would barely cut through the armor.  Panicking, he pulled out a pistol and shot the guy in the foot before jumping back a little.  Zoey then maneuvered behind him and smashed him into the floor with the hammer.  The man slowly grinned.  "GRENADEMAGEDDOOOOOOON!"  Thunder was faster to realize what he was doing and hit Zoey with a wind blast, sending her a car forward.  A powerful explosion ripped the car in half.  Thunder, having been blasted back a car, noticed the distance to the next car getting greater.  "Oh, fucking fantastic.  Guess I have to chase this thing."  He then jumped off of the wrecked car, turned on the hoverboots, and took off after the speeding train.

   Zoey turned to continue through the train.  She didn't make it far before a man in white confronted her.  She readied her hammer, but another man in white appeared behind her.  The two laughed in perfect synchronization before firing lasers from their pistols.  She dodged the first one's laser and rolled to the second, kicking his feet out.  He fell to the ground with a yelp, and Zoey putted him out the wall with her hammer.  Grinning, she pulled out her rocket launcher and turned to the first, who had maneuvered behind her.

   A resonating explosion rang out in front of Thunder, and he grabbed some of the shrapnel with his telekinesis.  He readied them in front of him and used them as platforms to get on top of the runaway train.  A man in orange-red robes met him on the other side of the car.  He pulled out a flaming sword and pointed it challengingly at Thunder.  Grinning, Thunder pulled out his own swords and rushed at the man.  The challenger swung his sword early, and a wall of flame erupted from the blade.  Thunder's eyes went wide and he barely avoided the flames.  Scowling, he sent a blast of wind at his opponent, knocking him off balance.  He then tossed one sword up, telekinetically grabbed it, and brought it behind his foe.  He then took repeated jabs at the man, all while he was getting backstabbed by the other sword.  Thunder was about to land the finishing blow, but the man shot a fireball at the train car, blasting Thunder to the back.  He pulled out his pistols and fired madly at the man.  Slumping over, the man dropped his sword.  As it flew at Thunder, he kicked it up and hit it with a blast of wind, sending it straight into his foe's skull.  The sword then glowed red, and both it and its owner went up in flames.  He then dropped through the newly created hole in the car.

   Zoey turned to see Thunder.  "Glad to see you caught up.  Oh, I killed that guy that robbed you, by the way."  "Huh.  Wonder what the hell they even need this train for?"  They entered the next car, which was filled to the brim with cargo and money.  "Oh."  A man in pinkish-red clothing heard Thunder and yelled, "Oh man, they got this far!  I guess you have a train to catch!  Choo choo, motherfucker!"  With that, he ran off to the front car.  Thunder groaned before giving chase.  Zoey, alone again, had a look out the window.  She noted a man in dull yellow robes planting a bomb at a support beam for the tracks.  An explosion soon engulfed the area, and the tracks far in front of the train caved in.  Panicking, she ran after Thunder.  Thunder had noticed the explosion, however, and drew his swords when he reached the front car.  He raised a sword, and severed the connection between the front car and the rest of the train.  He then whirled to face the pink man.  The man laughed, "Careful, I'm highly trained!  I'm so coal it hurts!"  Thunder punched him in the face.  "For god's sake, quit it with the freaking train puns!"  The train-happy man pulled away before pulling out a sack and throwing coal at Thunder.  It simply bounced off of him.  Thunder looked quizzically at the train guy before pulling out a pistol.  Before he could deliver the kill, mister train pressed a button and locked the door to the car, effectively trapping the two in the car.  Thunder growled before capping him in the skull.  He looked out the front window to see the hole in the tracks getting closer and closer.

   "...Shit."

   The train crashed down through the hole, and all went dark.

Why do I keep doing this

[Colonel ServBot]

Colonel Servbot SEASON 1
EPISODE 0: A NEW HOMEtotally not a starwars reference or anything

Spoilers since it's kinda long. This is basically an intro to the world of CutStuff. Or atleast the CutStuff that is seen through Colonels eyes... Err... Eye. Either way, basically foreshadowing the new plot line that's about to comeout. Also, our guest LeoAlex50 DID agree to be in this, but he agreed to it long before I left. Atleast I finished it up, revised it a little, and posted it now.

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Its been only a couple of hours since I've arrived in this strange new land.
I came here and entered an alley
I got attacked by a bloodthirsty gang
I escaped and took shelter in a casino
Argued with a waiter
And rented out a motel room
Survived a fire composed by the gang leader
And duked it out with the entire gang.

It's kinda unbelievable that I've done all of this in just one night, I'm pretty shocked myself, but I came here for a reason.
I am Colonel ServBot, and this is MY story


Colonel stood at a tall wooden oak podium, on a step ladder of course, and said to a large crowd of people
"So, hey guys... Uh, I, Colonel ServBot, is now he--"
"Pfft, I is, hah." Said a person in the crowd
smartass, if only I had middle fingers....
"Eheheheh" Colonel laughed nervously, he then shot the person a dirty look. "Umm... Well, I'm new here, and I just wanted to say hi, and announce my furthermore citizenship of CutStuff"
Colonel looked out in to the crowd, and saw many different faces, one looked like a ProtoMan with a blue torso and a key strapped to his back, one like a small angel in a straw hat, one seemed like a librarian wearing grey body armour and had brown spiky hair, and another person (who alsohad a large silver hammer with the letters B, A, and N engraved onto it) looked like the one in charge of the whole world. There were so many differences in each person of the giant crowd.
"Welcome Colonel! Hope you enjoy your stay!" Said an energetic person in the front of the group.

Whew, atleast ONE of them likes me!
Yeah dude, that was a close call!

After that one rather nice comment, the entire crowd then began giving Colonel Your-Welcome-to-stay-here's and have-funs and the like.

Wow, nice! They love me!
Yeah! Good Job Colonel!


After just a lot of chit chat and welcoming, All of the group left, except one, the ProtoMan Recolour.
"Oh hey there, I didn't quite catch your name, may I ask what it is?" Colonel asked politely
"Hey, I'm LeoAlex. Could call me Leo fer short though" said the recolour.
"Oh, hi Leo, a pleasure to meet you! Ummm, so can you help out me a bit? I think I just need some directions to places so I can memorize them, I'm kinda lost around here."

"Oh yeah, follow me, I'll show you around here, it isn't too hard to navigate"

LeoAlex started walking towards a shopping mall, and as instructed to do so, Colonel quickly followed.
"This place, is the Anything Goes Shopping Mall, next to it, is the SpamThread Deli. At the mall, me and my friends usually hang out there. But the deli isn't much of a deli, it's more of a slaughterhouse, since it only sells meat." LeoAlex instructed.

LeoAlex continued speaking of the houses, buildings, and other architectural structures. Up until he and Colonel walked to a large stadium.

"Ahem, this, Colonel, is the 8BDM Coliseum. 8-Bit Death Match, or it can be shortened to 8BDM, is like a sport of the gods. Except there aren't any gods involved, just the Almighty Administrators and the Moderators, but they're almost the same thing, in a way.... ANYWAY, Colonel, 8BDM is a blood thirsty and violent sport, but we can get into the later." LeoAlex explained
Jeez... This place isn't as peaceful as I first thought....
"Anyway, this is where the 8BDM matches are held. Thousands of people come here every day to watch the battles, for a hefty price. I mean, just the popcorn and soda alone! That's almost 20 dollars alone! Oh, and don't even get me started on the spicy chips and a can of Cutsy-Cola, don't EVEN-- oh, I'm getting out of hand... Aren't i?" He continued. "How's about we move on?"

He and Colonel decided to walk around the 'Coliseum'.

"Hey, Leo, about the 8Bit Death Matches, I have a question or six about them. Can you tell me about them?" Colonel asked. The two continued walking as they conversed.
"Ask away. I know almost about everything in the battles." LeoAlex replied.
"First off, what are the rules of the 8BDMs, and what makes it so... 8 Bit?"
"Well, you see, in an 8BDM battle, you face off against friends and foe alike. Each person who enters a battle is called a Player. And each player gets the same exact basic weapon as everybody else, a Buster. Players can pick up other weapons from around the map, or better yet, steal them from downed enemies. However, once you die you can't respawn with the same weap--" Leo said before he was cut off.
"Wait... You KILL people in there!? Wow I can't even... This place is very bad... So bad, so bad, so bad..." Colonel shouted out to Leo. Other crowds of people stopped everything they were doing, and looked at the small bot in confusion
"Dammit, Servbot, are you going to let me finish, I WAS getting to the 8Bit part! Anyway, before you rudely cut me off, you're not killing people off. Every body takes up an avatar made up of pixels, they wear them, in a sense. These avatars are officially named Skins. Some people can make custom skins, however it is a long, and tiresome experience. These skins protect the players, in a way. Instead, the skins take the damage, up until they can't take it anymore. Once they've taken enough damage, you'll automatically transported to another part of the arena. This transportation is called Respawning. Once you've been respawned, you'll lose all the weapons you've collected excluding the Buster, meaning you'll have to go back and recollect them one by one. However, very rarely, a player CAN be killed before they teleport, but it happens so rarely, no one took caution upon it. Either way, I wouldn't be worried. It's like a One-In-a-million chance of that happening." Leo said, then he began to gasp for air. "Whew, that was only the basics, there are many, many more Game Rules to go too... I think I'll just tell you about the most common one, Classic. Classic was originally called Death Match, but hey, nicknames have a huge power over their real counterparts, I guess. Anyway, in Classic, you're supposed to get a certain amount of Frags, or times you've made another player respawn. Once you've got that amount of Frags, you win the match. One thing that I think is cool is that when you enter certain  tourneys, or official tourneys, you can win a huge cash prize. Some regular Classic matches can even give you FIFTY CutBucks for placing in first!" Leo explained. He seemed rather excited about winning money. "In fact, there's a Doubles Classic tourney going on right now! Team Classic, it's the same thing as regular Classic except this time it'll be a 2v2 based thing. And since I don't have anybody to sign up with, how about you and I go in together? Like a team?" Leo proposed the offer.
Didnt I JUST meet this guy? Five seconds in and I'm already being asked to participate in somewhat lethal tournaments. Am I THAT cool? Or is this place THAT strange? Well, a cash prize does sound nice... And I AM broke at the moment... Well, why not give it a try?
Colonel held up his hand to Leo, and smirked.
"Why not, I don't have anything better to do." Colonel replied. LeoAlex grew a smile, and shook Colonels ServBot hand.
"It's a deal!" They both said in unison.

FunFact: The 8BDM Tourneys weren't even originally going to be IN the story plot line, just more gang and faction related shenanigans. Good thing I changed it though, jeez, Jex, or whatever his name was, was starting to be a little pain in my ServButt.

[Hallan Parva]

warning: contains stupid

SMASHBRO'S HALF-ASSED STORYTIME
Make Love, Not Wartortle

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[2:45:44 AM] Gospel: Wait, Ivory isn't a Touhou?
[2:46:00 AM] Ivory: A LONG TIME AGO IN A GALAXY FAR FAR AWAY.
[2:46:12 AM] Ivory: But then I hated the fanbase and stopped liking it as much

[2:46:22 AM] SmashMan.EXE: once upon a time Ivory didn't evolve yet and she was a simple Squirtle
[2:47:05 AM] SmashMan.EXE: then W-WWW-WW-WARP PANELS and Ivory learned how to not fuck up puzzles
[2:47:22 AM] SmashMan.EXE: with this newfound experience gain Ivory was able to transcend her lowly turtle form
[2:47:32 AM] SmashMan.EXE: and became a much more regal turtle... WITH BUTT FEATHERS!!!!!!!!!!
[2:47:48 AM] SmashMan.EXE: she was happy and content with her power until a wild douchebag appeared
[2:47:59 AM] SmashMan.EXE: it was that SmashBro kid who always eats all the jelly and leaves the empty jar
[2:48:23 AM] SmashMan.EXE: he kept throwing Grass-type moves at Ivory and making fun of her Wartortle body
[2:48:34 AM] Ivory: this is a terrible fanfic.
[2:48:37 AM] SmashMan.EXE: she got really sad but tried to ignore it at first
[2:48:42 AM] SmashMan.EXE: but it was TOO POWERFUL
[2:48:54 AM] SmashMan.EXE: so she said "hey Smash you're a dick don't do that" and he was like "ok coo"
[2:49:12 AM] SmashMan.EXE: then Korby came back from Wal-Mart with a carton of eggs
[2:49:31 AM] SmashMan.EXE: he saw Ivory sad while making a delicous omelette and was like "hey what"
[2:49:43 AM] SmashMan.EXE: Ivory was just "it's nothing go away" but Korby knew
[2:49:50 AM] SmashMan.EXE: he knew because he had HAWK VISION
[2:49:53 AM] SmashMan.EXE: KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH
[2:50:19 AM] SmashMan.EXE: Korby let out a mighty roar and stared into Ivory's soul with his hawk vision
[2:50:47 AM] SmashMan.EXE: "BOOM SHAKALAKA GIMME DA MONEY" Korby chanted, casting Lv. 9 Death
[2:51:02 AM] SmashMan.EXE: but instead of Ivory dying she turned into..... A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[2:51:09 AM] SmashMan.EXE: and then Joseph Collins showed up lol
[2:51:11 AM] Knux: t(o_ov)
[2:51:12 AM] SmashMan.EXE: THE END
[2:51:23 AM] SmashMan.EXE: this is what happens when I stay up too late
[2:51:32 AM] Ivory: Smash, you are drunk. Go home.
[2:51:45 AM] SmashMan.EXE: Korby totally has hawk vision tho (flex)
[2:51:48 AM] Kinopiko: http://i.imgur.com/AULzaCj.png

[2:55:31 AM] Korby: http://i.imgur.com/mWCSKcd.jpg
[2:55:31 AM] Korby: NONE CAN ESCAPE MY EYE
[2:55:35 AM] Korby: OR MY GRAPPLES
[2:56:05 AM] Ivory: KORBY, GO BACK TO BED

[xColdxFusionx]

I should start posting my stories here instead of just leaving them to rot on my harddrive and sending them to skype people.

Spades (A.K.A. Annette vs. Synthia, as written by someone who isn't Freeman)
(Warning: Contains Foul Language and Sexual Themes. And some violence, of course.)

(click to show/hide)

Annette wasn't really the most inconspicuous person in Castle Thatguy. Even if she spent a lot of time on an image board of similar initials, Annette's rather “street-savvy” appearance didn't really match the marble and fine tapestries of the castle halls she found herself in. Then again, it was fun watching all the men and women wandering the halls with her give her strange looks. Besides, she was never really known for blending in with the crowd.

A barely audible hum from behind a door caught her attention. Annette's cat-ears perked as she took notice of what to anyone else would be a normal door to a room of little to no significance. This door was special to script-kitty, however, because behind it was something beautiful, shiny, and (most importantly) technological. She scanned the airwaves just to be sure it wasn't a fluke.

Servers. An entire farm of them. All ripe with information that would be fun to sift through, no doubt.

Annette seated herself next to the door, shifting about to make herself as comfortable as she could on the stone floor. She closed her eyes, focusing intently on the signal she felt. To anyone else, it would look like she was just taking a nap. This would be a quick; she estimated she'd be in and out of the network in less than five minutes. Ten tops.

The correct answer, however, was revealed to be measured in seconds as the door flung open, slamming into her partially outstretched leg. Annette hissed in pain and fury, slinging curses no man, woman, or child would ever dare repeat.

Her plight was met with a cold, uncaring voice. “I knew I saw someone trying to get into the network. I'm unsure who else I should have expected to see.”

Annette was too busy clutching her injured shin in pain to care. “Holy shit, lady! Why the fuck would you go and do something like that?! Argh, jeez!”

The voice could care less what her guest felt at that moment. “You know that we here don't take very kindly to intruders, Ms. Navya. Especially those who tamper with our personal belongings.”

Annette shot a glare at her new “friend.” She was a woman, Annette guessed, most likely in her early to mid thirties. She reminded Annette a lot of Celeste, albeit with less space fetish and more regal white lab-coat-ish... thing. She was dressed very elegantly, as would be expected for someone working in a castle built for the self-proclaimed “king of the world;” her bright white coat was hemmed with extravagant frills and her clothing was all neatly pressed, with a care and precision that almost made her look like a living fashion mannequin. She adjusted her thin-rimmed glasses with one hand while balancing a clipboard under her other arm, returning Annette's look of animosity, albeit a bit more passively.

Eloquence wasn't Annette's top priority in this situation. “...Who the fuck are you?”

The woman straightened up a bit, continuing to tower over the rather-defenseless cat. “My name is Synthia Integrus, Thatguy's personal secretary and keeper of the royal archives.”

“Oh, so you mean the king's personal concubine?” Annette spat.

“Nothing of the sort. I have a feeling you would ft the job description more thoroughly.”

Annette stood up, wincing at her still-injured leg. It was probably bleeding a bit at this point; Annette didn't want to bother to check. There were more pressing matters at hand. “Are you sure? You certainly look dolled up enough to be His Highness's royal harlot.”

Her foe hardly even flinched. Instead, she smirked. “How cute, coming from the girl who lives solely to cater to lolicon fetishists everywhere.”

Annette scoffed. “I'm trying to listen to you, but all I can hear is 'I'm a total bitch who likes sucking the king's royal scepter.'”

“And all I'm hearing is 'I'm a worthless scrub who deserves nothing more than to be burned to death for the whole world to see.'”

“YOU LITTLE-!!” Annette lunged forward, only for her leg to remind her why this fight started in the first place. She winced in pain, barely catching herself on the ground. “...Ow...”

A black pump quickly knocked Annette from her hands and knees onto her back. She yelped in pain as her tail was bent under her; it barely managed to adjust itself to prevent any permanent damage. Synthia pinned her to the ground in the same swift motion as her kick, digging her heel into the cat's stomach. “Aw, is the poor little kitty angry? Perhaps I could cheer it up with a little stomach rub...”

Annette gasped as she felt the stabbing pain in her gut. This woman was insane, possibly even more so than her employer. Annette needed to get out of this, and fast. She quickly lashed out with her nails, raking the woman's ankle and sending it careening in the direction of the blow. The leg pinning her knocked aside and its owner unbalanced, Annette brought her legs to her chest, swiftly striking her assailant in the hips with a powerful kick. Synthia stumbled backwards, collapsing to the ground. Annette used the recoil of the blow to roll backwards, jumping up to her feet and quickly staggering back down as her leg throbbed again.

Synthia stood back up, fixing her glasses. “My, you're tougher than I thought. Though with your leg injury, I don't suspect you'll last long. I should just put you out of your misery like the rotten, soulless animal you are.”

Annette spat on the ground next to her. “You aren't exactly the pinnacle of humanity yourself, you filthy bitch.”

The lights in the hallway flickered out. Annette's eyes were made for this kind of situation; they quickly adjusted, catching a glimpse of her target as she seemed to vanish from sight.

“Oh, you're one of those assho-” Annette was interrupted by the lights suddenly returning, possibly even more powerfully than before. Annette covered her eyes, squealing in pain. “ARGH! What the fuck?!”

Annette's ear twitched. Footsteps, coming from her left. Annette quickly turned and swung at thin air. She let her eyes adjust, looking at the wall she just nearly broke her nails on. She quickly looked around to see if there were any signs of her foe.

Her ear twitched again. Quick footsteps, right behind her. Annette quickly ducked, watching as a stylus pen jammed itself into the wall she just missed. Annette jumped up, digging her elbow into the now-visible Synthia's stomach. The woman reeled back, her clipboard nearly falling out of her hand as she staggered into the opposite wall. Annette quickly snagged the pen, taking a fencing pose with it to taunt its owner.

“Well, this is an intriguing turn of events. Unfortunately, I'm starting to grow sick of your insolence.” Synthia quickly motioned across the surface of her clipboard, and the world around the two began to shift. The two were now in the streets of a city; skyscrapers and neon signs towered over the duo where the marble walls once stood. The cold night air was made even more frigid by the strong winds and pouring rain. Synthia once again vanished, her form barely distinguishable thanks to the rain bouncing off of her. Annette went to give chase, only to be stopped by a cop car screeching to a halt in front of her.

The street quickly filled with similar cars, each one filling the lanes and sidewalks with their own assortment of police officers, guns drawn and aimed at the young catgirl.

Silence filled the city as Annette tried to process what was going on. She looked around, counting up the officers. “Five... ten... fifteen...” she counted under her breath. The final total came out to thirty, give or take a couple.

...To be honest, this seemed familiar. She couldn't understand why. She felt like there was supposed to be someone else here with her.

...I know where I am.

Annette quickly scanned the airwaves to make sure her hunch was right. Thirty-four users. She quickly slipped her focus to the closest one.

Just as she suspected.

“Well played, Synthia, but you forgot one thing.”

Silence. She wasn't expecting a reply anyway.

“I love Smartlinked weapons.”

With a quick command, the cop's pistol fired on its own, the bullet striking his friend across the street. The rest of the cops tried to open fire on Annette, but she quickly rolled into a nearby alley, rigging up many more disasters on her way to safety. Guns exploded, recoiled wildly, even shattered in their owner's hands. Madness broke out as the trained men and women flailed about in panic, their weapons acting as if possessed.

Annette got to the next item on the list. She didn't recognize it as anything she had seen before. Nevertheless, she took a look into it.

Her prying eyes were once again denied as Synthia lunged for Annette, stabbing her in the side with the pen Annette had dropped in the confusion. Annette screeched in pain, backhanding Synthia into the nearby wall.

“Synthia” scattered into data upon impacting the concrete. Annette groaned audibly. “Are you fucking serious right now?! Come the fuck on!!”

Annette looked at the last item. Whoever owned this new device (her presumption at this point was that it was Synthia's, considering the signal coming from her doppelganger) was several blocks away at least. Of course, she had never seen this device before, so she couldn't tell the exact distance. “Hoo boy, this is going to be annoying as shit,” she mused.

Annette ran after the signal, trying to slip her way into the device in the meantime. This thing was secured more thoroughly than anything the script-kitty had ever seen before. Password after security question after key input screen after password blocked her way in. This was going to be a slow process, she could tell.

Another signal entered range. Annette went on high alert; after what happened last time, Annette didn't want to deal with anyone else at the moment. She was already not exactly in a good state from the stab wound and the leg injury.

A figure moved to turn the corner into the alley Annette was traversing. Annette quickly ducked aside into another and waited for the figure to pass.

The minute it took for the two paths to cross felt like hours. Annette sat there, quieting her breath as much as she could. She couldn't give any indication that there was someone here. She fought to stay standing through the pain she felt from her injuries, quietly continuing work on cracking the tablet.

When the sentinel did finally pass, Annette nearly panicked. A familiar black jumpsuit and blonde ponytail. Annette was glad that she didn't have to take that fight.

Annette quickly dropped her focus on the tablet to compile something to aid her. Her hands motioned in thin air, producing a red silk cloak which she quickly wrapped around her neck. To the untrained eye, it wasn't particularly special. To Annette, however, it was speed and grace incarnate, something she desperately needed if she was going to avoid a fight with the bitch-queen herself.

Annette quietly counted down.

“Ten...

“nine...

“eight...

Annette listened to the footsteps  slowly walking away.

“seven...

“six...

“five...

Annette listened to the chime as she cracked another lock on Synthia's tablet.

“four...

“three...

“two...

Annette listened to the sound of her own breathing.

It was now or never.

“ONE!!” Annette pushed off the ground, bolting through the alleyway, squinting to keep the rain from her eyes. She heard the demon behind her spin in place at the sudden noise, most likely to see nothing but a cloud of synthetic rose petals. She felt the pain surge through her injured leg with every other step, but she couldn't stop. Stopping now meant death.

She watched the signal strength rise rapidly.

50%...

Annette launched herself up the side of a wall, vaulting the chain-link fence before her with incredible ease.

60%...

Annette saw a street light. The main road.

70%...

Annette felt her foot hit the sidewalk. Out of the corner of her eye, she spotted her prey.

80%...

Annette rushed down the street, her feet hitting the pavement.

90%...

Annette lunged forward, screaming bloody murder.

Impact.

Annette felt her claws sink into Synthia's neck. Annette felt an intense pain in her stomach.

The two collapsed. The clipboard clattered on the marble floor.

Annette looked her adversary in the eyes. Synthia gazed back.

Something strange happened in that moment. For that split second, Annette felt a bizarre epiphany. Staring into Synthia's eyes, she felt a strange contentment. She felt like she had discovered something profound, something she couldn't quite explain.

She felt oddly complete.

The two laid there in the marble hall, gazing at each other.

Annette weakly broke the silence. “Good game, bitch.”

Synthia responded in kind. “Good game, scrub.”

Annette used the last of her strength to compile something simple.

She handed it to Synthia.

A playing card.

An Ace of Spades.

[Colonel ServBot]

Lets start with a new Character, shall we? Ive had this idea for a WHILE now! Now heres the thing, the main character isnt originally in CutStuff, however, Ive created an 'alternate dimensional' version where he CAN reside in CS.

Bounty Hunter XI - Chapter XX: Are you sure about this?

(OoC:: The XI is pronounced Eleven)

(click to show/hide)

In the darkness, two glowing electric blue eyes appear, and they look down upon the futuristic utopia. The eyes' beholder stands atop a high tower, watching down. He smirks, and crouches down. An arm reaches outwards and picks up a bottle of a dark-coloured soft beverage. "Bottoms up!" his voice cheerfully echoes as he unscrews the bottle's cap, and takes a swig. He looks at his right hand, and watches as it 'dissolves' into a small amount of glowing light blue cubes. His hand is replaced by only a light blue glow, in the shape of what his hand was. The Character moves his now-blue-shadow hand and the cubes move along with his fingers. he puts his hand down, and his cubes form into his left arm. After a flash of light, his left arm is replaced by a futuristic rifle from right below the elbow and down. A Scope is placed at the side of the gun-arm. The arm is lifted, and the arms beholder peers into the scope, ready t--
"Dammit XI! Are you just going to sit up here all damn night and play with yourself, or are you going to grow up and do your job!? How many times do I need to yell at you now? How many!?" A young female voice appears with the opening of a door, which emitted a golden glow from the inside light. The gun-arm re-dissolved into cubes which formed back into his right hand. "God dammit, Seriah! I'm internally monologuing right now! Jesus, gimme a break already!" a younger male voice replies angrily and sarcastically. The yellow light revealed the 'character' to be a young male, who appeared to be in his early 20's. The boy had spiked up Bronze hair, glowing blue eyes, a handsome young face, and an average build (Meaning he wasn't scrawny as hell and he wasn't as fat as Jabba the Hutt). He was wearing a Black jacket, with a Silver 'vine-ish' and spiky pattern going down the sides of the arms and abdomen. He was wearing dark blue jeans which were held up by a brown leather belt. The belt had a buckle which resembled two wings, with an '11' in between them. He also wearing black metal boots...Which were... metal... and... black? Either way, this guy, his name is XI (and its pronounced ELEVEN, don't screw it up)
"Who cares about your precious insane monologuing, just get out there and get us our bounty! He's wanted dead or alive, him being alive fetches us a higher price, so do it right this time!" The female voice orders. "Wow, you shoot people down so quick they should stick you in the military..." XI replied "But hey, a new bounty means we can pay the rent and bills. And I'm off!"
He said as he faced the young woman, he then leaned backwards and fell down the tower's balcony with his back facing the ground. He later turned around in mid-air and dissolved his legs and into cubes, which floated to his chest, and with a flash, he took the shape of what seemed like a cross between a motor-cross bike, and a hovercraft with his 'human' head sticking out of the middle. In this 'form', XI flew (but more in a sense of gliding) to a roof top.
Fricking Seriah, thinking she's the boss, my ass she's the boss! I'm the one who does all the work around here, dammit. XI thought to himself. He soon shifted back into his humanoid shape after landing. He put his right index and middle fingers to his ear and spoke
"So, miss boss, whose the unlucky guy now? The bounty I mean".
"He's actually not too far away from you. But he's a serious deal this time. He's worth a whopping 100,000$ this time! Can you believe it, if we got him, we'd be rich! The female voice replied.
"Err... I wouldn't say rich, but whatever floats your twisted little greedy boat. By the way, I need EXACT info on what he is, who he is, and where he is. That is if that isn't too much trouble for you." XI said as he walked to the other corner of the roof.
"Grr, just look towards the east, he's on the news right now, live! Causing a huge ruckus, smashing building, not our usual bounty." The girl replied with an agitated tone.
"Jeez, didn't know Aunt Flow came to visit today, gosh." XI teased as he jumped from building to building. He enlargened his jump length by 'cubing' up his other leg, and fusing it with his jumping leg. By fusing the legs, it made the jumping limb significantly longer.
Soon, a car flew upwards into the air.
"Aaaaaand this is where the guy is... Jeesh, He better be worth the Hundred-thousand!" XI teased. He jumped down from the building, and saw a Spherical Silver Robo-Monstrosity. He looked like a metal ball that sprouted arms and legs, or atleast according to XI's description.
"Whew, you sure are round, how much have momma and poppa been feeding you now? XI teased

TBC

[xColdxFusionx]

Oh shit this one's old
I should probably post it though

Written at some point during Cutstuff War 2

Initiation Starring Celeste Alaron and Elena Ampere
(WARNING: Intense Violence and Torture Trigger Warning.)

(click to show/hide)

Celeste sighed. It was nice to get fresh air every once in a while, especially when it meant getting away from that Oshiro fellow. He drove her crazy; couldn't he have at least a little respect for her, considering she was the most competent member of his forces? He just treated her like an intern, a job which she utterly resented. She was too important to be stuck doing the doctor's busywork, anyhow-

Something caught her ankle. The world seemed to stop in place. Celeste's entire body went numb.

A sudden jerk awoke her once again, flinging her into the alleyway. The motion loosed the mage's crystal ball from under her robes, sending it clattering down the alleyway. Celeste found herself in a strange embrace. Her mind was too clouded with confusion to think clearly.

“Celeste Alaron... Just the girl I wanted to see...”

Celeste felt herself be tossed aside yet again. Her head struck a wall. She fell to the ground, clutching it in pain. What the hell was going on?!

The figure stood over her. The shadows of the alleyway concealed her appearance, and the immense pain didn't help the situation. “I was just looking for you so I could give you a little... 'initiation.'”

Celeste began to panic. She didn't like the sound of this “initiation” at all. She held her hand up, chanting a spell in her head. Her hand began to glow as she mustered up as much power as she-

CRUNCH.

Celeste's focus scattered to the winds. She cringed in intense pain, holding back a scream. Her assailant grinned maniacally, her boot rubbing itself into the star child's ankle. “I'm sorry, my dear. You don't get a say in the matter.”

Celeste tried again. It was the only thing she could do, the only way to get out of this situation. All she had to do was just cast one spell, and she would have a chance.

“You're a persistent little twerp, aren't you...”

CRUNCH.

Celeste grit her teeth as her other ankle met the same fate as the first. The spell fizzled, the agonizing pain shattering the mage's concentration. “Try it again. I dare you.”

Celeste wasn't sure what to do. She prayed to the stars for guidance, for help, for something. She couldn't cast a spell, for fear that her wrists would be the next to be broken. She had to think of something...

The Will of the Universe! Her only hope was to reach the end of the alley. She would have to be careful not to make it obvious what she was doing; she was sure to be punished even further for this. She started to slowly slide herself over...

Celeste felt something strike her on the cheek. She collapsed to the ground, her body going numb briefly.

CRUNCH.

Celeste fought tears once again as her hand was crushed under her assailant's boot. This time, it was unsuccessful. She began to whimper in pain. What have I gotten myself into? I should never have left the lab... I'm such an idiot...

CRUNCH.

The horrid sound echoed in her head. With it, the last of her hope shattered. She was stuck at the mercy of the horrid devil standing over her. There was nothing left for her. She laid on the ground, crying in pain, praying that by some miracle she would be saved.

“Are you having fun down there? C'mon, stand up!”

Celeste felt something coil around her neck, pulling her upright. She cried out in pain, her whole body crushing her already-injured ankles. She collapsed onto her back, her head striking the pavement. She wept uncontrollably. She begged the stars to save her from this fate. She didn't deserve this. No one did.

“How does it feel, kid? How does it feel to be hopeless, defenseless, searching for a mercy you'll never find?”

The figure raised her whip. Celeste closed her eyes, tears flowing down her cheeks. The blows bounced off her. They were nothing compared to the pain she was already in, yet at the same time they hurt more than anything. She couldn't stop them. She had to just sit here and suffer. She begged. She pleaded.

Her prayer reached her lips. “Make it stop...”

The demon stopped, stunned. “...Well, well, well, our little star child here can speak! Tell me, how does it feel to be stuck with nothing left? How does it feel to be completely without control?”

Celeste cried. She couldn't do anything else.

“Well? Answer the question. It's not polite to ignore someone.”

Celeste said nothing. She didn't have the strength.

The figure laughed. “Let me give you a little advice, kid; sooner or later, you're going to be in this exact same situation, whether you want to or not.” The devil leaned closer. Celeste started to whimper in fear. “I haven't even shown you the worst that can happen, either. There are people who will torture you in ways no living being should ever be. There are people who will view you as nothing more than a toy or a tool, something to use however they see fit. If you're not ready to face that fact, if you don't think you can handle being unimportant, if you don't think you can handle being treated as less than human, as less than animal, even, then pack up your pretty little ball and leave now. This isn't the place for you.”

The figure stood up and turned away. “If you can, however, then welcome to the war.”

[Colonel ServBot]

The Somewhat Canon Death of Colonel ServBot

(click to show/hide)

A boys eyes widened as he awakened from his slumber,and it was past midnight. He had a determined expression on his face, the expression basically said 'It's time'. Silently, he sat up. His head quickly turned to the left, facing a silver laptop that was placed in the exact middle of a desk. He quickly got up from his bed, and walked over to the laptop. He opened the top, and clicked the large silver power button. After waiting merely for what seemed like an hour for it to start up, his eyes gazed upon his Panty and Stocking With Garterbelt desktop background. Afterwards, his eyes quickly shifted to an icon with the file name of Colonel.TXT. He clicked it once, and slowly dragged it to the upper left hand corner of the screen. The boy heard screams of pain and pleading as he dragged the icon, it was screaming things like 'No, don't do it! Please, stop and think about what you're doing!'. He soon held the icon over the Recycle Bin Icon on the screen. And, within seconds, he let go of the mousepad, killing Colonel ServBot in the bloody process. Afterwards, the boy turned his laptop off, and closed it. He quickly turned around, and walked towards his bed. He soon just slumped, almost lifeless into the mattress. He knew he was going to sleep easily tonight, and for the rest of nights.


THE END...?

First off, I'd like to say that this is a somewhat serious thing. I'd like to announce that I am no longer expanding upon good ol' Colonel over here, and I will only post what I have planned for the bot. After I finish the entire story then, he will be nothing more than that of a distant memory that really needs to be forgotten. Just sayin'.

[Darkus4223]

This seems nice.
Might as well post one of my old writings.

0% of love

(click to show/hide)

Why did it have to happen?
Why did I have to be abandoned by them...?
There was nothing I could do.
They just left me there.
All I did was hurting my father for him hurting me.
How am I a "monster"?
Why can't you just tell me?
Why can't you just help me?!
Why can't I leave?!
Will I ever understand this?!
Why can't you just tell me?
Can I just understand?
Please tell me how to live without them!
Will I live to see the daylight?!
Just tell me right now!
What does a single man say when the earth turns to the color...
White?

Well, I think it's less writing more Literature... yet I still decided to post it.

I believe i'm in heaven!

[Colonel ServBot]

Colonel Servbot
SEASON 1
EPISODE 1: ROUND ONE, START!!!

(click to show/hide)

Its strange for me, just visiting a place so long ago, and now I'm going compete with a total stranger in a tourney where you 'pretend kill' people dressed up as blue robots. First, I just thought coming here would allow me to get some R&R, some time to relax. But I guess it's good that I'm able to focus on something other than blood thirsty men in leather and Mohawks and snobby waiters. The people of this futuristic land have taken a mediocre liking to me, maybe if I try hard enough, they'll end up loving me for sure, ha.

Right now, the stranger I mentioned earlier, LeoAlex, and I are in the Coliseum, we went into a room called a 'server'. Right now we're training....

Colonel set foot onto a circular pad. Right now, the room was a blank, white empty boring room, with bright white ceiling lights. "Alright ServBot, are you ready? This'll be our first time 'training'." LeoAlex questioned. The servbot nodded in reply. "Now, before we start anything serious in particular, how about we teach you the basics?" Leo said as he grabbed colonels arms and lifted them enough so that his body what in a 'T' posture. "First thing, when loading up, you hold your arms outward like this, that way the codes and such can register you in as a player, and so you don't killed."
"Mmmhhhmm, anything else I should know?" Colonel asked, cocking an 'eyebrow'.
"Nope, not till after it's loaded." Leo answered. Leo stepped onto a circular pad next to Colonels, and raised his arms. Afterwards, the lights dimmed until it became pitch black, with only the pads emitting a bright green light. Soon, a light greenish blue digital wire frame appeared around every angle and curve of Colonels body, and the same happened with Leo as well. "Keep your arms up." Leo warned. Soon after the wire frame stayed on the two for a while, more of it appeared in the shape of a large cube, encaging Colonel and Leo. "This, is the loading of the game, we'll be in the Plant Map in a couple of minutes," He told Colonel. "Just keep holding that pose until the models completely render"
After a minute or two,  soon small chunks of the models came together in between the 'blank squares' like pieces of a jigsaw puzzle. The chunks started from the bottom of everything, like Colonels and Leo's Feet and the  floor. "Woah.... It's kinda... Kinda pretty how everything just forms together like this. And I love the colour of the squares." Colonel said in awe. His 'jaw' would've dropped, if he had one. And a couple of seconds later colonel was covered up to his neck with his 'skin' (see episode 0 for explanations of the skins). The chunks of data were slowly creeping up Colonels face, and when his eyes were covered, he could see a yellow bar at the side of his sight. Now, the wire frame disappeared entirely. "It's safe to move now" Leo said. It sounded as if his mouth was covered by a mask or something. Colonel eased his arms, and turned his head towards LeoAlex. He was now donned entire blue, cyan, and white Armour, with a Magnet at the top of his forehead. "Well, looks like you've got the Joe Skin" LeoAlex joke fully said. "The what skin?" Colonel replied with a question
"Y'know, you're wearing the Sniper Skin, fits you good now, let's get started, first off, look at your right arm."
Colonel lifted up his right arm in front of his face. "WOAH, what happened to my arm!? Where'd it go!" He cried while flailing it around. "Calm down, your arm is still there under the skin, and be careful with that thing, that's the buster I mentioned. Now, you see that yellow bar at the right side of your view? That's your Health. When that bar gets empty, you die. You don't want to die in this game, got it?" Leo instructed. Colonel replied with a nod that signaled a 'yes, I got it'.
"Now, since I'm teaching you, I'll go easy on you, you'll get a 30 second head start to get as many weapons as possible." Leo said. He snapped his fingers while shouting the word "GO!!".
Colonel dashed off into the murky woods. A squishing noise was made with each step he took, and the bottom of the boots on his skin were covered in mud already. Soon, something shiny caught his eye. He slid, and took a few steps backward. He found a strange icon of pink leaves arranged into a circular shape, and the icon was bordered by a white glow. He reached towards it, and as soon as his ’fingers' came into contact with the icon, it dissolved into his fingers. At the top of his screen, the sentence 'Leaf Barrier Collected!', appeared. "Huh... Weird... I'm guessing that was a weapon" he whispered to himself. He looked around.
Good, he's not sneaking up on me
Colonel turned back to the direction he was running to, and continued running. He kept running for what seemed like hours for him, until he found a huge mound of rocks, which had a weapon icon with a Saw Blade on it. He jumped up, and grabbed ahold of a ledge of a boulder, and hoisted himself up, letting out a huge 'ugh' while doing so. He climbed up the rocks, and picked up the weapon.
Metal Blade Collected!
"Eh, that'll get annoying real quick" Colonel muttered to himself. He obviously hated the 'weapon get' messages. Colonel then got ready to do a sprint, and ran towards the edge of the top, and jumped before he would've fell off. While in mid-air, he flailed his arms around like a maniac, before hitting the ground hard and rolling on his side. "Gah!" Colonel gasped as he fell down face first into a mud pile, which was only covering a Rock hard substance. He got up, and wiped the murky mud from his view, only to see LeoAlex standing right in front of him with his buster aimed at his face. Leo had the blue coloured Armour still, but the inside of his buster was glowing bright green. "Oh h--" Colonel tried saying, but he was cut off when LeoAlex fired a long green lasted blast at colonels face.
RESPAWNING IN 3... 2.... 1... RESPAWNED
Colonel was teleported into a random part of the map, he appeared to be in a small area which only had a small amount of dirt where trees and forestation didn't cover.. "God damn it! I thought I was supposed to be taught, not killed... And MAN, THAT HURT!" Colonel screamed.  "But... Where AM I?" He asked him self. He saw a weapon with a brown missile icon in a tree top "Ha! This has gotta be useful!" Colonel exclaimed as he climbed the tree. He stood atop the tree branch, and reached for the Missile Weapon.
Search Missiles Collected
Colonel looked at his buster, and tilted his head to the right... And with a flash, his blue Armour was now coloured brown, like the missiles from the icon. "Woah! Nice! I could definitely try using this!" Colonel said excitedly. He looked at the tree branches which seemed like they were perfectly aligned to eachother, perfect for running around the map unnoticed. He started walking among the tree branches quickly, but quietly. Soon a sound of feet crunching on the grass and flora appeared under him. Colonel stood silently above the prey below him, he crouched down, and peered below. He identified his soon to be victim as LeoAlex again, but this time he was donned in purple Armour, and held a large shuriken I'm his hand. Colonel held his buster arm back, and waited for Leo to pass. As soon as the sound of Leo's footsteps died down until they were near silent, Colonel dropped down quietly, and punched forward with his buster. As he punched forward, his buster unleashed 5 missiles forward in a shotgun spread. As soon as they got close enough to Leo, they homed in, and all hit him in the back. "GAH!" Leo gasped after being shot with missiles. Colonel kept punching forward over and over again, with each missile making contact with Leo. This time Colonel held his arm back further this time, and with time, the buster started making a loud 'Vrrrrrrr' sound, along with glowing blue. Leo reached his arm back as well, and got ready to throw the shuriken in his hand. After a while Colonel ran forward, jumped,  and punched forward, releasing a barrage of missiles in Leo's direction. Leo dashed forward, and sliced each missile in half, causing them to fly behind him while emitting a huge fog. Leo looked pretty damaged, especially after taking dozens of missiles to the back and face. While he was still in the air, he threw the shuriken at Colonel. "AGH!" Colonel screamed as he jumped to dodge the sharp bladed star. After it hit the ground, it dissolved into the air. "Woah, woah woah WOAH" Colonel said as he ran and dodged the seemingly thousands of shurikens Leo hurled in his way. Colonel just kept running until Leo stopped for no apparent reason. Colonel stopped, and Leo crouched to his knees, and looked to the left and right. Then he shrugged his shoulder with a "Meh". Leo suddenly changed blue and his buster started to glow green again as he chased the ServBot. Colonel continued running for his life, while he tried turning his head around and punching behind him. Leo shot a green beam as Colonel. Colonels eye widened, and he slid as the beam passed over his head. Had he not slid, the beam would've most likely been a fatal hit. Colonel kept punching behind him, but nothing happened at all with each and every punch. Leo suddenly turned purple, and his buster arm changed into a regular hand. "ITS NO USE!!!" He said as he pushed his arms forward, and Colonel was pushed backwards as well. He flew backwards until he hit a tree. "Ugh.... Hey! You weren't even close to me, how could you push me like that!" Colonel questioned. "Two words, gravity. Hold." Leo said as he snapped his fingers upward, which sent Colonel flying upwards into a tree branch head first, breaking it with a loud crunch. Colonel flew back down as soon as he hit the branch. "Grah... For a digital thing, it hurts a lot!" Colonel whined. "Oh, forgot to tell you, for every hit you sustain in this game, it hurts just as much as it would in real life."  Colonel looked up, and he noticed that his health bar was nearly empty. "Eh.... So... Would THIS hurt!?" Colonel said as he suddenly turned blue, and quickly put his buster under Leo's chin, and fired as he said THIS. Leo fell backward, and as he made full contact with the dirt and soil, he exploded into a huge collage of Circles, also making a "Byoo-Byoo-Byoo" noise.
"Now... How do I get out of this forest....?" Colonel quietly asked himself. He walked forward with a limp, and with his left arm clutching his right arm. However, a few minutes after, a message appeared in his view.
DRAW!

"W-w-whaaat?" Colonel said with curiosity. Soon, all of his pain went away, and the map went entirely pitch black. And soon Colonels Skin faded away, he could see Leo all away on the other side of the room. He waved to Leo and ran after him.
"So... It's a draw game?" Colonel asked.
"Heh, I guess. You did pretty great for your first match. I did expect a little more from a guy who took down Jex's guys, but you still did good. How about we try again on a different map?" Leo asked
Colonel smiled, and nodded in agreement.

Now I know this isn't entirely accurate to the actual MM8BDM, but I thought of adding a bit more creativity and 'realism' into it. Personally, I think this is going to end up getting good. If you payed attention to last episode, you'll know about the Skins a bit better. I think I did good. What do you guys think?

[Thunderono]

so we've pretty much established by now that I've got a pretty lackluster style
not a whole lot of storytelling talent
and repetitive dialogue

and you know what I don't give a rat's ass about it let's post more shit

Assault of Two

(click to show/hide)

A man sits hunched over a workbench.  He appears to be working feverishly over what looks like some sort of gun.  This goes on for several hours.  The man, satisfied with his work, picks up the gun and places a large battery inside of it.  As he prepares to fire it at an assortment of socket wrenches, he receives a knock on the door.  An old looking man strolls in and examines the other man's work.

   "I trust it's just about completed, then?"

   The worker seemed startled by the question.  He had not had the chance to test out his new creation, yet.  Struggling to find some excuse, he replied.

   "Well, uh, kind of?  I think I've got a working version, but I'll have a bit of difficulty testing it out.  The reflection module's been a bit out of wha-"

   "I'm not going to insult your intelligence by pretending to care what's behind all this technological nonsense.  I need this done by the end of the week, and I fully expect you can handle the task.  Don't disappoint me now, Lungei."

   With that, the old man departed.  Lungei, still somewhat in shock from the surprise visit, returned his attention to the prototype in his hands.

--Elsewhere--

   Everything was a massive blur.  No matter where Thunder looked, it was a mess of blur and color.  There's some green over there, a bit of white there, a little splash of red there...

   Actually, the red looked like it was moving.

   Thunder tried to focus.  He looked around in an attempt to figure out where he was, but to no avail.  The red was pretty close now.  Thunder could have sworn he heard something.
   "...a...ght?"
   Thunder strained to listen to the words.
   "A...ou...ri...?"
   He tried to figure out what the sound was.  Were the walls speaking to him?  Were they trying to give him a mission?  Because by god, if the walls needed his help, he would gladly offer his h-
   A sharp impact came across Thunder's face.  The shock of the smack brought him into focus, and he could finally observe his surroundings.  He was on a couch in a room with dark green walls.  Beyond that, he had no clue to where he was.  He turned towards where the red was.

   "Any better, now?

   Thunder recognized the voice, a voice belonging to Zoey.  She didn't exactly seem too pleased with him.

   "Do you have any concept of how long it took to find you in that wreck?  ...At least an hour!  You're lucky I even managed to find you.  You were banged up pretty badly, so I took you back here.  But, god!  Crashing in a speeding train!  Is it always like this with you?"

   Thunder grinned.  "I'm nothing if not dramatic.  We ever find anything on the train?"  Zoey blanked out for a few seconds before replying, "Kind of?  The straightforward answer is we found a bunch of guns and money.  But we also found documents.  These guys have a leader based in some big old university sitting by the Topasudek range.  Pretty huge place, but these cultist douchebags are pretty influential there.  You thinking what I'm thinking?"

   Thunder gave an ecstatic look.  "...That we go in there and lay waste to the place?  Hell yeah!  I've been craving a little destruction, anyway."  Zoey simply looked concerned.  "Er, well barring that last comment, we can't just destroy the whole place.  I mean, it IS an actual University.  I was thinking we cause a little chaos, then slip in and cause some damage where it counts."  Thunder pouted.  "Damn, I was getting really hopeful.  So where are we even headed?"

   "We're off to the Qniversity."

[Ceridran]

so we've pretty much established by now that I've got a pretty lackluster style
not a whole lot of storytelling talent
and repetitive dialogue

and you know what I don't give a rat's ass about it let's post more shit

Considering that I can't make a single story where someone actually talks, and I get disgusted whenever I try to do something, (especially with making characters-- MARY SUE CHARACTERS) I disagree.

[Colonel ServBot]

Bounty Hunter XI
Book 0 - Chapter XX.2

Warning, language and violence and fluff. Y'know, the usual.

(click to show/hide)

The silver ball robot turned his head at XI, and revealed that he had two police officers in his 3-fingered-hands. The robot roared, flaunting his square shaped teeth. "Wow, tubby, calm down. Let's not have anybody get hurt today, alri--" XI tried saying, but the robot cut him off with another loud roar. He raised his monochrome arms, and threw the officers down, slamming them down hard on the cement. XI heard a loud crunching noise as the police men hit the ground. He gritted his teeth, and balled his right hand into a fist. "Alright asshat, you had no right to do that! I usually taking my bounties in alive, but you're about to be an only exception if you keep doing that! I swear I'll rip you apart limb from god damned limb!" XI threatened loudly. The robot finally walked up to XI. "GRRRAGH. TWELVE!!!"  He roared at XI. "So you must be Project XII, it'll be fun tearing you to shreds!" XI said, but he shouted the 'shreds'. He lifted his arm up a little and shifted the arm from the elbow down to something that looked like the end of a scythe. XIs scythe arm was a shiny platinum, and it appeared as if it were a newly manufactured blade, coated with a silver shine. The blade was reversed though, sprouting out of the direction of where the bottom of his arm was. XI slashed at the monsters face, damaging one of his golden glowing eyes. The monster stumbled backwards, and clutched his now-missing eye.  He screamed in pain, and charged at XI. XI countered with a jump, and lodged his blade into the back of the monster. It let out a loud yelp, and grabbed XI, and slammed him into the ground in the exact same manner as he did with the police.
"Gah! Ugh, you got an attitude on you, don't ya?!" XI said angrily, he got up, but suddenly the monster grabbed ahold of him again, and threw him behind. While flipping in midair, he shifted his legs into something similar to white small air-plane engines, and shot himself at the monster, and cut it's left arm off. It growled angrily and swatted back at XI. XI shifted his legs back into his normal feet, and dashed at the monster. The two traded blows left and right until a black helicopter came into the sky. They looked up at it as it dropped multiple ropes down, soon, people in black body Armour and face masks slid down the ropes. Each and every one of them pulled out rifles and pointed them all at the Monster and XI. "We are the CSPD, and both of you are under arrest. Stand do--" one of the men said, but he was cut off by the monster, who let out a large roar. "Huh, looks like De Ja V-" XI tried saying before he was slapped out of the way by the mechanical beast. He then charged at the black armoured officers. XI got back up, dusting himself off before shouting "NO!". He raced forward to the beast, and 'cubed' his left arm and moved each of the cubes into the scythes blade, which extended it's reach. And with seemingly lightning quick speed, XI dismembered the beasts arm, and legs, causing it to fall over and roll slowly forward. He walked up to the limbless monstrosity, and stabbed it in the center with his blade. Each and every one of the CSPD officers aimed their rifles at XI. "Hold, stop where you are!" The same one said. XI 'cubed' his arm back into place, shortening his blade. He lifted his right arm and flaunted his middle finger to the officers, and jumped up to a nearby roof of a building, carrying the ball-beast, still stuck on his blade. He stood on the building for a minute, and looked at the two first officers who were possible crippled by this monstrosity. He had a sad expression. "I'm so, so sorry... If only I was there earlier for you guys...." XI whispered. He then continued to jump from roof tops to avoid and further attention. "After him! He's now a criminal to us, I want him back. Alive." The CSPD officer said in a cold, harsh voice. "Yes, sir!" The others replied. The helicopter lowered down to the ground, and all but the leader boarded it...


XI reached a tall red metal building, it had a tall tower atop.
Hey, you, yeah you! Remember when I was on that one tower last chapter? Yeah, that's this place. I kinda live here
"Ugh, home sweet home..." He muttered as he opened the door. A five foot tall, 17 year old blonde, girl shot XI a stern, and angry look. He called the look the 'death-stare'. XI closed the door quietly, with the monster still on his blade. "God dammit XI! Do YOU even KNOW the trouble you're in?! Huh? Dammit, you were on the NEWS! THE DAMNED NEWS! Do you know that the MILITARY is looking for you! What in the hell has gotten into you! You're such a bad hunter! God, I knew I should've left you back in that labora--" The girl shouted out as she got up from a red sofa, but she was cut off by XI.
"Seriah, shut the literal hell UP! Damn, I got you the bounty, so shut up. The CSPD aren't going to find me, they aren't going to find US. Now we've got the bounty and a guaranteed hundred thousand. Okay? You can calm the hell down now." XI said aggravated. Seriah, the girl mentioned earlier, grumbled back at him. She grabbed a pillow from the couch and threw it at him. It bounced off his chest and plopped on to the brown carpet. XI looked down at the dismembered ball monster. "Where's that guy go?" XI asked. "The guys gonna take him some time tomorrow. He'll drop off the moolah when he comes." She replied.  Seriah realized that there was something wrong with him. He usually never screamed back at her before. Only one other time that happened. All the other times he came up with stupid 'Monthly or Daily Friend' jokes. As he started to walk up a spiral stair case, she stopped him. "XI, what's wrong? You don't normally act like that." She asked sincerely. She's kinda like a cactus. They both have a hard, spiky, and painful outer layer, but inside, they're soft and squishy. Ew. XI stopped walking up, and turned around. "There were two officers, they were just... Beaten by that thing. I just felt bad for the guys... I still feel bad for them" he replied
"XI, you've gotta think, the pigs out there devote their lives to that, they get hurt and killed and stuff so they can protect people."
"But think, they DIDNT protect anyone. who knows who got hurt... Or killed by that fat bastard."
"We don't know, but think, look at how many lives you saved by taking him down. If that guy was just going rampant around town, then the Mods would've had to do something, or maybe the Fusion Five, or someone. But we ALL know how long it takes for them to get to something."
"Heh, I guess you're a little right, thanks Seriah."
"A LITTLE right? Get your scrawny labrat ass up those stairs." She said angrily. XI was easily affected by the pain, suffering, or death of others. Except for those who 'have it coming to them'. Seriah knew this, and tried to comfort XI when such circumstances occur.


The next day XI woke up on the same balcony from last weeks chapter. He yawned as he stretched his arms. He lifted himself up, and looked down on the sunlit utopia. "Well, another day of living, woo." He said as he picked up a soda bottle. He uncapped it, and drank from it. "Bleh" He complained, after tasting that flat, warm nasty long-since-expired soda, anyone would. Seriah slammed the door open, and walked outside. She was wearing a red nightgown. "What's up with you and the colour red?" XI teased while being 'half-awake'. "I like the colour red, since it's gonna be the colour of your blood splattered all over this damned building if you don't get up!" She threatened. "Man... And you were so nice last night... Shame that you have to have your monthly friend be a dai--" XI continued to tease, but he was cut off by Seriah placing her foot on his abdomen, and kicking him off the building.
"Gooooodddaaaaaammiiii--" XI shouted before he came into contact with the hard concrete below. He got up, placing a hand on his head, and mumbled: "Ugh.... Note to self... Seriah doesn't screw around in the morning...". He got up, and opened the front door. Seriah was in the room, sitting on the couch, eating cereal and watching the Television. "Guh, why'd you do that? And what's the day today? Isn't it Monday or something? Don't you got school today? You're still in school...right?" XI moaned. She grabbed the remote, and turned the TV off. "No XI, the Qniversity's closed today.... I think. What's it matter to you anyway? I'm the boss here." She replied, death-staring XI again. A large, muscular red man with long, black, wavy walked into the room eating a piece of buttered toast. "Oh, XI, you're down here. I thought you were busy sleeping in on your balcony." He said in a calm, deep voice. "Ugh... Yes Matrex.... But I had a rude awakening." XI replied, looking at Seriah angrily. She sarcastically smiled back. XI lifted up his middle finger in her direction as he walked into the room Matrex came from, otherwise known as the kitchen. There was a skinny, tall robot, with those limbs that weren't attached to his body, but they acted like they were, sitting at the round table, reading a news paper. For some reason the robots limbs were always distracting to XI. He walked to the counter, keeping his eyes trained on the spaces between the robots arms and shoulders. The counter had a tower of buttered toast. Each piece, stacked together so elegantly, and in order. Each one mathematically even. The robot sitting at the tables name was TECHNICALLY 'ICX- M.O.D.E.L. 3609x', but we called him Steve. Steve had a bad case of OCD. Meaning that if anything was out of order in his line of sight he would've pulled off a Seriah and want to kill everything in his sight. XI picked up a piece of toast, and with his other hand, he knocked down the toast tower. "Hey, Steve, check this out." XI said as he walked out. Screams from the kitchen were heard. XI was always a playful guy, and he especially loved creating mischief around the 'base'. "Alright boys, go get the other guys, I've got an announcement to make." Seriah said aloud, as she was still eating her cereal. Matrex started to climb up the stairs. "Wait, Mat, stop. I've got a better idea." XI said. He cubed his left arm and fused it with his right arm to shift it into something that looked like a long pole with a flat platform at the end. With his new arm, he pounded on the ceiling, "TAKAMURO, NOLAND, RASPUTIN, WAKE UP, SERIAHS AUNT FLO IS VISITING AND SHE NEEDS YOU GUYS TO GET DOWN HERE." XI shouted so loud that the whole block could hear it. Seriah facepalmed. "God... Damn... You... XI..." She muttered angrily, gritting her teeth. Out of nowhere, a kid with spiky orange hair appeared out of nowhere. The teleport-y guy was Takamuro. Then two guys came down the stairs. One of the guys had short blond hair that had bangs parted to the left. That guy was Rasputin. The other guy was a little on the 'over-weight' side. He had curly brown hair, and glasses. That was Noland. XI didn't talk to much to Takamuro, since he isolated himself in his room whenever he had free time. Which was most of the time. Not a lot is known about him. He just sits in his room and only god knows what goes on in there. But he is skilled in hand to hand combat, and he's a pretty deadly assassin. One time a guy gave him a bounty of HIMSELF. Somehow Takamuro did it. Rasputin and XI were generally on good terms.  They never disagreed or argued with each other, although XI questions his 'Moral Sense of Direction'. Rasputin was a huge fan of fencing, and had a couple million swords in his closet. The final guy, Noland, was XIs best friend out of the group. The two had a lot of fun playing video games, watching animes, and more nerdy activities with each other. Although XI HATES playing chess with the guy. Noland is basically the groups mascot otaku nerd boy. Every group ought to have one. However, he's kind of 'plum-useless' as a Hunter, XI was the only reason he's still in the group. If it weren't for him, Seriah would've dumped Noland out on the road.
Steve ran into the room and pointed at XI and screamed: "You bastard! Do you even KNOW how uneven you made the toast! I specifically put it in that nice, clean way for a reason!". "XI, what'd you do this time?" Matrex asked. "This is not the time for that now. But I've gathered you all here for a reason." Seriah announced. She bent over and picked up five different portfolios. She then threw one at each of the hunters. "These, are your new bounties. The five came from the same guy, at the same time. If you guys can take 'em, we can get the money. I'd also like to thank XI over here, yes, that reckless prick over there, for helping us gain a HUNDRED THOUSAND MORE DOLLARS!" Seriah exclaimed. She was excited after getting the 'prize money' from a bounty. But since this bounty had such a high price, she was really happy. She giggled like a little girl after saying the word 'dollars'. "But anyway, here's your bounties. The guy wants them dead or alive. And in by the end of the week. However, I'm pairing up Noland and XI together since Noland can't hunt to save his life." Noland and XI looked at each other. "Looks like we're a team!" XI said cheerfully.

Wow. That's a lot to write. I have too much free time. Anyway, that's the end of the 'preview' for BHXI.
Also, huge announcement. I'll be focussing more on BHXI rather than just Colonel ServBot.